Sorry, I was about to write a clever blog but I just looked away. I found something else to do, something less painful than trying to figure out something fun and interesting to write for you. All week I’ve been fighting writing a new blog post like a 2-year old who doesn’t want to go down for a nap.
I have been feeling a profound sense of inner resistance. It’s been running through every fiber of my body and it feels like thick, stagnant mud. It’s worse than the quicksand in a Hanna Barbara cartoon. It’s a deep quagmire from which I still see no immediate exit. It’s making me restless and easily distracted. It’s making me uncomfortable and edgy. It’s writer’s block.
So how did my inspiration and drive evaporate overnight? What happened to all those great ideas? How did I run out of gas this early in the game? I’m guessing that fear settled in at some point when I wasn’t looking. I’d like to point and say it was last Tuesday but I think that fear has been lurking about in my mind for a long time now.
The fear I speak of is that old, familiar ugly monster sitting in the back of our minds. That evil little troll who has super-villain powers. It likes to pop up randomly like a cheeky monkey and jump all over our hearts and minds. It loves to beat us into submission. It enjoys taking us to those dark and uncomfortable yet familiar places in our minds where we are the star in our own shows, “Not Good Enough” and “Doomed to Fail”.
And like a lamb being led to the slaughter, I let fear walk me down the path of self-doubt. All week I kept catching myself editing my thoughts about subjects to blog about. “No, that’s silly.” “Nobody wants to read about that.” “That’s not consistent with your website.” “What am I even doing, maybe this blog was a bad idea.” etc. The more I edited, the less I was inspired to create content. The more I fretted about not having content the louder the nagging discontent emanated from my mind. Like a tourniquet, fear cut off my fountain of inspiration finally forcing me to blog about it now. I can’t just sit here in a state of resistance and distract myself any longer.
I see you fear and now I need to let you go.I’ve resolved to move past my resistance, so get out of my way as I write my way out of this blasted writers block!
So let’s talk about resistance. Resistance is a topic that could use a little attention because I’m afraid, like in my story above, it’s gotten a bad rap. Resistance is that psychological and sometimes physical response we get when we come up against personal challenges. It’s the road block we put up to stop ourselves from moving forward.
The resistance I felt this week was rooted in fear. We’ve all experienced resistance from fear. Our therapists have warned us about it and our yoga instructors have urged us to breathe through it. But resistance doesn’t always have to be about fear taking us to dark places or holding us hostage. In fact, resistance doesn’t have to be a bad thing at all. Sometimes resistance is exactly what we need in the most positive way. Sometimes those signals of inner tension are a sign of transition and growth.
My Handy Guide to Using Resistance as a Guide
Think about the situation or decision that is giving you pause. What is your body telling you? Notice if you feel any resistance either physically or emotionally.
Now think about abandoning the situation or option entirely. Yup, just think of what it would be like to say No to it or any other options around it. How does that make you feel?
In other words, think about how saying Yes makes you feel then think about how saying No makes you feel.
Is the resistance keeping you from what you want or is it asking you to say the No you need to say?
You’ll know the difference immediately and you’ll know what to do.
Trust yourself enough to let resistance guide you.
Originally published at jeligavric.com