There is a time in our lives – when extremely dark & cold winter hits our lives drastically, and when we need someone to provide the warmth with their wise brain and a good heart, sometimes even more.
The same dark winter was in my life. I was utterly lost in its darkness, and there was nothing I know which I can do. I lost my job in the fall of 2017.
I was looking for a new life. With every bit of my savings and every drop of experience, I started a business. It failed as soon as I could say – FUNDING.
The life was turning into a really shitty mess. I was at an age which socially recognized as the “age of responsibility.” And doing nothing.
Wise advice from an old man –
Then I remember my first mentor, my grandpa.
He once told me – “Look, boy, there will be the time when you push yourself in your best days. You give everything to conquer a hill-top, but as soon as you reach the top and yell with every sort of energy left within you. You wish to sing the victory song with your leftover energy filled with enthusiasm and happiness. You raise your both hands up-in-the-air. But the next moment, your satisfaction is falling under the influence of yet another but much giant mountain.
Now your happiness is quickly turned into a negative state-of-mind. At that time, do not do anything. Think nothing. Stop, stop and open your bag which you were carrying with you all the long there, dig into your pocket, take out the book, any book, and start reading.
That’s it, boy. Do nothing, think nothing, only read.”
And that’s the powerful advice which helps me in my all-time fall & rise. No matter what the condition is in your life – a happy one or a painful situation. Always have a book with you, and read.
Read whenever you feel to read, read whenever you need to read, and read whenever there’s nothing else to do.
Reading will calm you, take away your stress, and give you the strength to reflect on your life.
I don’t really know how it works, but books and stories are indeed the reflective mirrors of life, more like a time machine, taking us in times.
Let’s pledge to read more books and live more lives with these great words from George R.R. Martin – “A reader lives thousand lives before he dies… The man who never reads lives only one.”
You do the things you read, and now you know something. And here comes the second mentor & her advice.
A toxic relationship and my second mentor –
At that time, I was in a toxic relationship. I wish you would never know what it means to be in a terrifying toxic relationship ever, neither I do.
At that time, nothing good was happening around me. Due to a suppressing partner who only demands to do unnecessary arguments, I was producing no results. Even worse, I was killing my dreams to life.
You know what – a ‘No relationship’ is always better than a toxic relationship.
But we are mere humans; we’re an emotional creature. How can we let someone leave our life?
Ah! My beauty with a devil’s heart was dumping me like a rotten apple. Nobody wants the awful part of a ‘rotten apple.’ Even the apple hates its presence. So was I. I was broken like a child had his favorite toy broken in identical pieces.
And here comes my second mentor to rescue me from another downfall – my mom.
Her advice was simple, sweet & short.
“Give yourself sometime, and the time will heal everything.”
It was a piece of excellent advice at that time, and it is perfect at present too.
Time shall pass & it must pass; we only need to be a little more patient and a little more vigorous. Not too much, but a little more.
Third mentor and her crippled man advice –
And here comes the third mentor, the love of my life. It was the time after I finished from severe business failure and started a new journey.
Now it was going good enough, but I was turning evil – not that with the blowing plans yet. However, some evil notion of superiority was eating my brain & soul. That potion was black & poisonous.
It forced me to think myself superior with my work & disgrace the mediocre life. Wait, what?
Yeah, you heard it right, if you’re mediocre if you think so. There was a time I abuse your presence. I think of you like a worm without life. But as I told you, it was an evil thought before my third mentor, and the love of my life directed me towards something beautiful. What is it?
Her advice is directly proportional to the growth of your mental strength. Because love is what we need the most.
So when I was all up to the Mr. Perfectionist Nobel of the world of excellence, and cutting the small chops of poor things, and people. She told me about the importance of everything & everybody.
The advice was – “All life matters, even the life of a crippled person.”
How & Why?
Well, there’s an exciting explanation for the same example. Let’s check that crippled man again; if that man does something good, it is a lesson that anyone can do good. If that person does something terrible, it is a lesson that anyone can do evil, even a crippled one.
But if that man does nothing. Well, it is also a lesson that anyone can do nothing & still live a meaningful life. Sounds confusing?
It was confusing for me, too, in the beginning, then she explained.
If that person does nothing but still, someone feels pity about him, empathizes with him, and feed him. So take it like this – this crippled man is the reason for humanity in us. One the other hand, if some other little boys feel wrong about this man, and determined to be strong, this crippled man acts as an inspiration for this little boy.
And in that way – each and everyone is living a meaningful life, in some way or other. Never disgrace anyone, and you could live peacefully even at the worst time of your life.
That’s all of living.
The summary in a nut-shell –
1- Read whenever, whatever you get your hands on.
2- Take time, give time, and time will heal everything.
3- Every life matters, even yours, so respect it, love it, and live it best.
At last, before closing my words. I wish to add one crucial advice – the importance of breathing. I’ll not talk about the always positive BS, because you’ll definetly find the opposing force around you, trying to tear you apart. But the chances are vital to fighting them, if you stop, breathe deeply before doing anything.
Stop, breathe, and reflect. What’s your best advice from my three mentors? let me know it the comments. (or let me know your best advice.)