Defining moments. We all have them. That one incident that calls attention to our choices. That makes us question the way we see something or someone. While I can’t say under generalization “What’s wrong with people nowadays”, I surely can relate.
Funny, but I just asked myself something similar today. I meant it in just a general sense though, that it seems that some have no scruples whatsoever and that the need for success, money, fame sometimes outweighs common sense. I believe in some sense that we are somewhat born with the knowledge of good and bad. We start out innocent and, our eyes see so much. This is what I said to myself today, as a matter of fact. I put filters on my social media after noticing that someone used an idea that I gave them maybe a year ago, (actually it was a funny joke) but they used it to garner attention for themselves, and of course, made themselves look like a genius. If anyone uses your pm’s to them and makes them public, they are not, repeat not a friend. I mean, who does that stuff, right? It wasn’t okay with me and I felt betrayed. I was just nice enough not to call them out on it.
“I just basically trashed everything in my life today. I decided to start fresh, I deleted and removed “old friends” ha, they were never really friends to start with, just folks who take a great idea and use it to make it theirs. I’m tired, tired of dealing with so much bs, I don’t need it, I don’t want it anymore. I’m done. From now on, I’m not sharing work with anyone other than those who are on the same path as I am and who can fully understand and appreciate it. No more “likes” I don’t give a flip anymore. Unless it has a message and drives me further, it has no place in my life. Same with people.”
Yes, I was going to make a post of this but decided to keep it to myself. We all think that way now and then. I got up on my righteous soapbox.
Everyone’s moral code is different, what may be right for someone (or wrong) may not be seen that way by others. Lack of understanding, lack of parental involvement growing up, empathy, life exposure to situations, all have a bearing on one’s personal code of ethics. The need to garner validation, being cute was probably the reason behind (okay, I call it stealing) someone else’s idea. They didn’t think before they acted. In many cases, this lack of morality has the same mo, people do not think before they do something, they just see it one way and seldom do they realize the consequences of their choices or actions. Perhaps they do after the fact. Who knows. All I can say is that the person in question has now shed light on their lack of judgment, lost my trust, and well, is not thought of as high as I once thought of them. I hope it was worth it.
The fact of the matter is, this wasn’t the first time that they did this. They “accidentally” released my personal information in a Facebook trailer video that contained a chat message. Imagine my face at the time I saw that clip. Luckily, I think they realized they had violated my privacy rights and the clip somehow mysteriously got deleted, but yeah, I should have heeded the warning signs of disregard, but, by what they did recently, they slammed door number two for sure. That was my wakeup call because I knew that with such blatant disregard they were showing a lack of respect. What else would they do to bolster their ego for view and likes; and would it be a constant need for them. For the first time in my life, I was the one who did the ghosting. I knew if I confronted them on this issue it would only result in some very harsh feelings, I’m not one for stirring the pot, so I let it go and went dark instead. I had to decide if it was worth it. They broke my trust, so, yes, it was justified. I’m not waiting for an apology that will never come, so, I let it go.
I don’t see this as harmful intent, more like just a foolish decision, but who is to say that if this behavior isn’t curved that at some point it wouldn’t be so innocent. It’s a choice. This wasn’t okay with me, and any strength that we might have had in friendship just fell away. This was a rude awakening to rethink the people I chose to call friends. I learned a bitter lesson. Friends don’t do this. I don’t make people question my loyalty, but maybe that’s just me.
My heart feels like it was hung up and left to dry.
Was it a question of a careless mistake, or something else. I might never know. I’m not going to ask. I will hold space with the hope that eventually they see their costly error.
The price was losing my trust.