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You Speak of Love But Your Facebook Posts Are All About Hate

The Blindspots of Our Mixed Messages

LIBERAL: Lazy. Ignorant. Bastard. Exuding. Racism. And. Lies.

Like if you agree.


Yes, we are a nation of immigrants. See the line? Get in and wait your turn.

Like if you agree


The border wall is good, border minefield is every better!

Like if you agree


Posted by a man who is the author of a book about love and understanding.


“Angry Mobs of Liberals Will Destroy Our Country!”

“Hillary Clinton and her terrorist groups planning attacks if midterm loss.”

“Libtards and their fake news!”

Posted by a man who claims to be a truth seeker of love.


Most punchable face in America. (Picture of Ted Cruz)

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. (Picture of Trump at a rally)

Posted by a woman who is a spiritual teacher and an expert on love connections.


I shake my head and say to myself, “You speak of love but your Facebook posts are all about hate.”

These posts could be the result of a Russian bot trying to trigger us and sway our decision making in the upcoming election, or it may be an area of human behavior that we need to understand.

At a time when the division and separation of our country are at an all-time high, we are looking to leaders that will unify and advance our society. The challenge is overcoming the blindspots of our mixed messages.

Mixed messages impact all relationships. It can create misunderstandings that lead to conflict and resentment. When anyone gives mixed messages it affects our ability to trust, understand, and connect.

  • How many times have you become triggered because of someone’s mixed messages?
  • How many times have you unfriended someone because of mixed messages?
  • How many times have you ended relationships, personal or business, because of mixed messages?

Many people don’t understand the beliefs and emotional states run the show when establishing impact, intentions, and communication. They believe they are being transparent and self-disclosing. Unfortunately, we are blind to our mixed messages.

To tackle the blind spots of mixed-messages we first need to be aware of them.

Blind Spot: Not Evaluating Intent vs Impact

In all of the recent cases of sexual misconduct the perpetrator’s response was always, “That wasn’t my intention,” or “I didn’t mean any harm.”

When I asked individuals about their negative, fear-based Facebook posts their response was the same. In fact, they felt they were helping society and educating them on what they believed to be true.

Intentions, good or bad, unconscious or conscious, are based on beliefs and programs within our mind. They are based on self, character, and identity.

We get so caught up in the intent we forget about the desired impact.

Starting with impact allows us to look at the bigger picture and access our emotional intelligence to connect to others.

If people thought about the impact of their Facebooks posts they may or may not choose to post. They may instead, seek to understand.

If we look at the sexual misconduct examples we see the focus was solely on the individual’s intent without regard, acknowledgment, or responsibility for the impact their actions had on their victims.

Blind Spot: Not Knowing Ourselves

Living in a society that programs us through fear, separation, and competition makes it challenging to uncover our subconscious beliefs and know who we are.

People live their lives based on social roles and social norms. They believe they need to behave a certain way to be accepted by their tribe. This behavior can create an unconscious bias in the way we communicate.

Recently Christian TV host, Rick Willis, warned his followers that MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow will lead a bloody coup to overthrow the Trump Administration.

Even though Christianity is a religion based on the teachings, and love, of Jesus Christ, Rick Willis may believe to be accepted by his tribe he must frame Rachel Maddow as evil, and trigger his fan base through fear.

When we know who we are, without the programming of society, we are aware of our thoughts, intentions, and actions. We don’t get caught up in the egoic programming of the mind and live from our truth and purpose.

Blind spot: Everyone Thinks Like Me

When we assume that everyone sees what we see, feels what we feel, and thinks what we think, we create a blind spot of communication that can be the root cause of many mixed messages.

When we are consumed and attached to our point of view, we are unable to connect with others’ perspectives. If we did, we would understand how differently we see the world.

In fact, when we are addicted to our point of view we lack the ability to connect to others and are focused on persuading others to agree with our message, cause, or movement.

I observed this with the examples I mentioned at the beginning of this piece. The individuals were so focused on persuading people to support their cause, or point of view, they lost sight on how to co-create communication that evolves a society. They lost compassion towards people who have an opposing view, and probably got a dopamine high when triggering people into fear.

Facebook and other forms of social media have the potential to connect individuals, families, and communities or separate. If we are to evolve as a society we must be willing to have difficult conversations, build communication-based on trust, and open our eyes to the blind spots of our mixed messages.

Let’s start every day by impacting the world with love, have your intentions match your behavior, and find your truth. 

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