“I try my best to confront situations because I know, at the end of the day, you can deal with it or it will deal with you.”
– Jada Pinkett Smith
The Habit
I have developed a habit of deciding who I am going to be regardless of the outcomes. When I walk into a classroom, when I go into work, or at the start or end of the day, I have decided what kind of person I am going to be before it is all said and done.
I have learned that committing to being who you are and making your dreams reality means that one cannot allow themselves to be negatively affected by certain situations.
I am not saying that we cannot learn from certain situations, but what I am saying is that we cannot allow those situations to take our focus off the mark. I cannot give people the power to steal my happiness from me.
Managing Emotions
In The 4-Hour Work Week written by Tim Ferris, he states the following: “You and I can only be effected by our thoughts about something. Never the thing itself.”
Like everyone, I get angry. People say and do things that make me—no, they do not MAKE me do anything. But rather, I ALLOW their actions to upset me and that acts as a distraction.
Do not allow a single instance to redefine your whole character. This is apart of developing emotional muscle.
Instead of containing that emotion, I learn to recycle that emotion and use it as a catalyst in other avenues of life. Working out, drawing or even just writing as I am now.
Learning how to recycle my emotions was extremely difficult, but I am learning and I am only getting better.
Deciding Who To Become
I decide who I am going to be whether the outcome is negative or positive. Whether the outcome is good or bad does not matter; all I need to know is that I am prepared to keep pushing on no matter what.
But to be quite honest, I almost never even think about the unfavorable outcome(s); I am to too preoccupied with thinking about the positive outcome(s).
This does not mean that I do not prepare for negative outcomes, it just means that I spend more time focusing on the positive during the course of the situation.
Make It A Win Despite The Outcome
If the outcome is positive I just add it to the list of things that will keep me motivated. If the outcome is negative, I STILL add it to the list of things that will keep me motivated since I now have something I can advance on.
It works both ways, especially when the decision is made before the outcome is decided.
It is simple; either leverage the situation, or the situation will leverage you.
Using This New Thinking To Combat Anxiety
Developing this habit has helped me to combat anxiety tremendously; I seldom approach a situation worrying about “what if” because afterward, I have decided that I will NOT let the outcome control my future.
This is really just a formality of time management. I believe that success requires persistence as well as speed. The more time I spend being angry, licking my wounds, or worrying about the past, is time and energy I can spend directing it towards someone in need or something productive.
Final Thoughts
Lastly, this is not a habit that is meant to be built on your own. My friends and family have been a support system for me throughout my entire life. They have supported me through times of trial and I hope that they continue to do so.
I encourage others to seek out healthy people to support them. However, remember that friends and family can support you to the ends of the Earth, but when it is all said and done you are responsible for your ongoing happiness and growth as a human being.
So what will you do today to combat anxiety?
Marquis L. Taylor is a blogger, digital marketer and online store owner who aims to spread the message of personal development and financial freedom. You can receive his 15 Tips To Making the Mental Shift by clicking here.
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