Shelter-in-place order was applied to your state, this means your mother-in-law is moving in, you’re forced to live with your estranged sibling, or destructive roommate. So where does that leave you?
Here are 4 tips on how you can get through the pandemic with those that cause strife within your home.
Set boundaries:
When it comes to any toxic relationship setting boundaries is a must and it can seem daunting when faced in a situation where you are forced to stay in close quarters with them, but it is manageable. Using “I statements” help deterrent defensive attitudes from the get-go. Being direct and communicating well with your boundaries will eradicate any confusion for what you set as a boundary.
Focus on the positive:
Our brains are automatically hardwired to think negative since our ancestors were only left with the flight or fight mode. When we are constantly being bogged down by negativity it can make an entire room feel tense. Thinking and focusing on constructive things will help you not only stay emotionally strong, but it will help you combat any unnecessary argument that may arise later on.
Don’t let emotions get the best of you:
Letting our emotions fight our battles for us only leave us with regret later. Take a breather, go for a walk, or talk to a friend on the phone. Taking time away allows you to collect your thoughts and tackle the battle with a clear mind. Try looking at the bigger picture. When we are upset we tend to think only in the moment. If we take a step back and see what the greater problem is, we’re allowing ourselves to focus on what it is that is really bringing the offense.
Pick your battles:
Not everything has to turn into an argument. There are some things that you can choose to just let go and move on. If you review the motivation behind the quarrel it can help alleviate unnecessary tension. Agreeing to disagree is another great way to stay focused on the things that really matter and letting go of the things that don’t.
Bottom Line:
Staying with someone who is straight up an annoyance is one thing, but living with someone who is emotionally damaging is not healthy for anyone in the home. Until this pandemic is cleared and you can move on, try setting boundaries, staying focused on the positive, let go of unnecessary emotions, and picking your battles will help alleviate any redundant drama. Make sure that you know you are worth value, it won’t always be easy and letting go is okay.
If you are in a toxic relationship where your life is in danger, reach out to this center and they will be able to help you get to where you need to go.