The Key Process To Becoming an Authentic Leader

How Women Leaders More Effectively Influence The World

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I fervently agree with the Dalai Lama’s opinion, “The world will be saved by the western woman”. However, it cannot be saved from the same energy that has created the current culture, mores and structure.

Before we can fully LEAD (ourselves, our teams, our companies), there are two key areas that must be addressed.

This is the 2-step process I’ve used to help my female clients who have felt they had to be tough and masculine in order to get their voices heard. By shifting away from that hard edge, they found a far more effective and fulfilling way to lead.

It may come in the form of healing old wounds for ourselves, our teams, our communities.

It may look like skill development, refining tools, reinforcing policy – whether personal or business.

It may look like letting go of unhealthy relationships, purging unworkable habits or changing course altogether.

Make no mistake, we don’t need to be in suits, nor grandstanding in politics to make the impact we are here to make. We can fully step into leading the lives and businesses we are meant to lead – from right where we are and in each role we have.

No matter your position or situation, the first step in the process of becoming a great leader is to find and cultivate: Unwavering Courage.

When women decide to take a stand, many times we will be targets. Held accountable in ways that men usually are not. This is readily seen in our personal relationships as well as in business. Just think of the women who choose not to have children and focus on career and calling instead. Judged and ridiculed by men and women alike. Or like powerhouse CEO, Therese Tucker who defied the odds, going all out with her billion dollar tech company and then gets attacked for taking a stand with her hair color. (She happens to look awesome with purple hair)

Those are just a couple of the myriad of examples. The fact is, we as women MUST have UNWAVERING COURAGE.

And what does that really mean?

Courage: noun, the ability to meet danger and difficulties with firmness : the ability to do something that you know is difficult or dangerous

Derived from Old French corage, from Latin cor ‘heart.’

You see, the HEART is a key Energy vessel, not just the organ but the essence of our Unity and communion and it is where we need to lead from FIRST.

This piece must be in place.

How do we get unwavering courage? I am going to venture to say that each one of us has expressed in our lives at one time or another that UNWAVERING Courage.

Can you think of a time or two? Just remembering those moments will be a powerful action step this week! When you recall those past moments of unwavering courage – recall every nuance, the smell, the textures, the sounds. Feel into that moment and use that to bring you strength for something you need to find courage in today.

This unwavering courage is something we must each continuously cultivate for ourselves, as well as each other – to build fortitude in order to fulfill our Dreams.

The second piece that we need to focus on is Resilient Confidence.

The confidence to BE fully oneself without having to tear another down in order to show up is crucial, but it’s got to withstand the attacks that are inevitable when you take on a position of leadership. Too many times I’ve seen women leaders who think they need to be dominant and hide behind a masculine image that keeps them from fully stepping into their own authentic place of power. The one we all want to listen to and follow.

To cultivate that resilient confidence gives room to be supportive of another without forfeiting your own needs. The confidence to take the time you need to restore and reset if flopped or you don’t know your exact next steps. It’s great to act fast when you need to but it’s also great to take a step back and you need to know the difference.

This week, set aside your SELF CARE time with a focus on your HEART. Bring your setting back to a 50/50 balance of compassion for self and others.

Take one action that you know you want to complete this week and make a promise to yourself that by the end of the week you will complete that. Whether it is telling someone NO, you will not be attending that party, NO you won’t be volunteering for that fundraiser, or YES, I will take on that role and I’m excited to do so.

Whatever that piece is for you, do it from a place of PURE HEART.

When you have completed that, take the time to honor and acknowledge your hearts choice.

When you need reinforcement, connect to your body’s “center” use your “power stance” and shout, even if silently (but it’s better out loud!)


Go Lead a Life and Business YOU LOVE – Courageously!

Stephana is a transformation coach helping clients get more results with less BS, for themselves, their team and their bottom line. Sign up for free weekly optimize tips on her website and check back every Wednesday for her latest column!

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