Even when we are aware that we are holding ourselves back because we lack confidence, it can be difficult to transform our thinking in a meaningful way. Low self-confidence is a real barrier for many women when pursuing their goals.
If you suffer from self-doubt, you are not alone. Everyone struggles with insecurity from time to time. But if you are feeling like low self-confidence is holding you back from reaching for more, then it is time to make a change. You deserve to achieve everything that you aspire to, and it is possible.
There are many useful strategies you can practice to shift your thinking. Today I am sharing one of my favorites with you. This is to create a persona (“alter-ego”) for yourself, that embodies the person you want to become. For many people, this is the person you know you are on the inside, but you’re struggling to share with the world for fear of how you will be received.
The idea behind this approach is that by creating a persona that embodies the characteristics of the person you want to be, you are giving yourself some mental distance between your private insecurities, doubts and fears, and your aspirations. By taking your insecurities out of the equation and thinking about yourself as a character you want to play, you can transform the way you think, create, and behave. While this persona still needs to be authentic to you, it can help create the distance you need to forget your insecurities and focus on your strengths; on who you know you can be.
Performers often use this strategy to overcome stage fright or the overwhelm of fame. My favorite example of this strategy being used effectively is Beyoncé. In November 2008, Beyoncé appeared on The Oprah Show where she talked about her alter-ego, Sasha Fierce.
“Beyoncé says she crafted her stage persona to help her overcome challenges and give the best performances she can. ‘It’s kind of like doing a movie. When you put on the wig and put on the clothes, you walk different,’ she says. ‘It’s no different from anyone else. I feel like we all kind of have that thing that takes over.’
Sasha Fierce usually appears right before Beyoncé is about to take the stage. ‘Usually when I hear the chords, when I put on my stilettos. Like the moment right before when you’re nervous,’ she says. ‘Then Sasha Fierce appears, and my posture and the way I speak and everything is different.’
Your mind is your most powerful tool in creating the life that you want. You only have to get out of your own way to achieve your deepest desires. Beyoncé’s experience with Sasha Fierce is great proof of this. Over the years, as the pop star’s list of accomplishments and accolades grew, she presumably grew more comfortable with herself, and said goodbye to Sasha Fierce.
In 2010 she said:
“The thing that’s interesting is I don’t need Sasha Fierce anymore, because I’ve grown, and I’m now able to merge the two. I want people to see me. I want people to see who I am.”
When you are consumed by doubt, worry and insecurity it can be difficult to take the bold steps necessary to achieve your goals. Because when you are too critical of yourself, you limit yourself from thinking and doing the big things that create real change in your life. Don’t let your self-doubt become your prison.
The first step on this new journey is to allow yourself to dream big. Don’t be afraid to create the person you know you are meant to become. Then take that big leap (or channel Beyoncé and step into that stiletto) and live your vision for your future self, even if you need to create your own Sasha Fierce to get started.
When you live your vision long enough, it will become your reality. Once you have consistently pushed yourself beyond your comfort zone, you too will feel ready to retire your self-doubt and say goodbye to your “Sasha Fierce,” your insecurities, and your doubt.