Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn; I have a profile on each of these platforms. I spend a bit of time on each of them daily. Some days I spend more time on them, and other days I am almost obsessed with them. Yes, I can admit that. And, no, I am not proud of those binge days, but I know I am not the only one. Just that I am actually admitting it!
I recently had a conversation with someone who made me rethink my social media profiles. Made me rethink what I post, which in turn had me going through all of my accounts and looking at my posts.
The conversation we had was around what people post. He was very direct in his feelings about the shit that people share, and how little others care about them and what they are doing. In talking to him, I realized that he may be on to something.
It got me thinking about updates I have read, and what those updates make me think about the poster. There are different categories of posters:
– The happy posters. The ones that share funny stories, cute pictures and jokes.
– The deep posters. Motivational quotes, self improvement quotes (yes, I have shared many of those!)
-The cryptic posters! These ones are the attention getters. You know the ones, they will say only a few words such as “I know my day will get better”, or “Why me?” or similar. Sometimes they will check-in and it is a hospital. And right away the troops rally with “are you ok?”, “what is going on?” “what happened?”
-The perfect life posters. The ones who have the perfect life. Perfect job, perfect spouse/partner, perfect children, perfect house, etc…. They are living a prefect social media profile life. That’s all.
We all have a profile life. Some more than others, and some keep it real, while others use it as an escape.
We judge. We all judge. Do not sit there reading this shaking your head at me. You know you judge. I judge. You judge.
Back to the conversation that started this. My friend asked me “Who cares what you do, what you eat, or whatever.” Well, I care. And that made me realize that maybe I was over-sharing what I do on a daily basis. Don’t get me wrong, you do not see a daily selfie, or posts of EVERY meal I have. But, I do share when I travel, and when something exciting is going on…cutting off the tip of my thumb, my daughters meeting Broadway stars, and others.
The other thing is that everyone that I am “friends” or “connected” with, are people I know. People, that for the most part know me, or are family or I simply want them to be part of my life. I like the idea of sharing what is going on in my life to a certain point. I don’t accept invitations from strangers. I get connection invites all the time. People that have never met me, and we have NO mutual contacts. Why?
My friend also said that whatever he does in his life he does for himself. Be it traveling, eating, training.. all of it for himself. He said he doesn’t do it to share on Instagram or anywhere else. He lives his life for him.
That part got me. Why? Well let me tell you, how many times have I taken a picture and my first thought is: “Post-able?”. I realize that happens more often than not. And I have to be honest, that kind of freaked me out.
He really got me with the comments about living his life for himself.
Are we living our lives for everyone else? When did we stop living for ourselves? When did we become so self-obsessed with what we are doing and when can we share it with the world?
I have always been a fairly private person. I do talk very openly with my friends about much of my life. However, I still keep quite a bit to myself. There are days where I break down, there are days where I look in the mirror and think; damn my hair looks good, other days I will sit by the water and think of how blessed I am…I do not share everything. I like to have some thoughts that are mine, and only mine.
My life is pretty good. I have a great family, amazing friends, a career I love, I went back to school, started a charity, and I get to meet new interesting people all the time.
On the flip side, I have major anxiety, dark days, moody-I will rip your head off-bitchy days, and quiet-leave me alone days.
But they are all my days, and it is my life. The conversation with this wise life loving friend got me thinking about how I want to live my life, and although I will continue to share moments, pictures, random quotes and some of my life with the world, I will also continue being me, to the fullest, and maybe even a little more because of what he made me think and feel.
After all as Bon Jovi sang “It’s my life”, and Frank Sinatra made sure we knew “I’ll do it my way”. Agreed.