To the Italian I bid farewell.
I say good-bye to you as I bid farewell to the year. You brought me a lot of love, got me in touch with my sensuality even more, showed me romance in a way I hadn’t experienced, demonstrated kindness that touched my soul and for all that and more I’m forever grateful.
You left long ago but my heart was still with you. It has taken me months to come to terms with the reality that I need to let you go. What I had with you was magical and because it was dream-like, I wanted to believe you would come back. I liked who I became when I was with you – fun, mischievous, assertive, sensual, romantic, spontaneous, and so much more. A big part of what I’m missing is who I was when I was with you. But it doesn’t mean I can’t be that person without you. I just need to find that on my own. It took your energy for me to become this person and it flowed organically. But I know I can reignite this energy without you.
Even though what we had was effortless, you left hence I need to bid farewell to you. Holding on to what was has held me back from being in the present moment and in truly living. The memories whilst sweet, have also made enjoying life so much harder. I’ve hoped, prayed and dreamed that you’d come back. But if you were meant to be with me, you would have returned. The fact is you chose to walk away. I cannot expect things to change by simply waiting endlessly while you live your life.
So many spiritual teachers have told me that you are my twin flame. But if that was true, then you’d know that too and be here with me but you’re not. What mystics and new age mediums believe and what reality is, are quite different. I’m now choosing to be real. Whilst I enjoy fairy tale, I can’t have my head in it if you can’t see that too.
I’ve also learnt that every experience is neither good nor bad. With you, I experienced romance and love and with someone else I’ll learn something else. There is always growth with every rendezvous, only if we want to see what there is for us to learn. I look forward to more experiences to grow in ways I haven’t. When those lessons or growth have come to surface, may I know within me that it is time to move on to more richer and soulful experiences.
I wish you nothing but peace, love and all that you want to experience in life.