For me it took months of complete confusion until one day, things came together with an amazing clarity and I want to share some very obvious, but somehow overlooked ways of getting clear on who your ideal client is.
Contrast Exercise
I started my business in 2012, but I started it on the wrong foot. I did not even think twice about choosing who to work with — as long as they were interested, I took the job. My decisions were based purely on getting paid, and frankly, I was not getting paid well. Not even industry standard. Accepting any job, so my family wouldn’t starve. This is the worst place to start growing a business from because it comes from a mindset of victimhood and not having enough. As a result I attracted people who not only were ignorant and unappreciative of my help, but also lacking integrity to pay me on time or respect my boundaries. People who bullied me and made my whole life miserable. Nice, huh? Who is to blame? ONLY me. This lasted for a few years.
I never actually sat down at the start and thought about the type of person I wanted to work with. Maybe it is because I did not have experience working as a freelancer. I just wish 6 years ago that someone would show me the exercise I am about to share with you today.
See, people are funny. They focus on the negative much more than the positive. So when one is asked: “Who do you want to work with”, it is much easier and faster to list the traits of people one does not want to work with. Well, let’s take advantage of that.
Law of attraction practitioners use it very often. Identifying what we do not want helps us get clear on what we do want, as often it is a direct opposite.
So grab a piece of paper, or you can download the sheet by clicking on the link: https://juliettestapleton.com/contrast/.
If you are using a blank piece of paper, make a vertical line right in the middle. The header on the left hand side should say: “I hate working with people who…” Start listing traits that you cannot stand in your clients.
Here are my examples:
CONTRAST I hate working with people who…
I hate working with people who cancel calls without notice
I hate working with people who never implement my advice
I have working with people who forget to pay on time and force me to chase them for money
I hate working with people who are not passionate about their businesses
I hate working with people who contact me any time of the day, when they feel like it
Now read each one of your CONTRAST statements and ask yourself: “What DO I want?”, and start writing the opposite statements on the right hand side.
Here is what I did with mine:
CONTRAST I hate working with people who…| CLARITY: I love working with people who…
I hate working with people who cancel calls without notice | I love working with people who always show up on time and if they cancel they give me plenty of notice or a valid reason
I hate working with people who never implement my advice |I love working with people who take my advice and implement the strategies as coach them, because if they do not work or feel wrong, we will develop strategies that will feel right. I love working with people who are committed to taking action and adapting as we go.
I have working with people who forget to pay on time and force me to chase them for money | I love working with people who are secure in their relationships with money and are happy to pay me upfront for my time and expertise
I hate working with people who are not passionate about their businesses| I love working with people who are extremely passionate about what they do — they live and breath their gifts and cannot wait to share them with people who need those gifts
I hate working with people who contact me any time of the day, when they feel like it | I love working with people who have integrity and respect my free time — so they keep their questions for the next session or meeting, post them in my free Facebook group, or email me rather than calling, texting or sending private messages.
Here you are clearly defining your ideal client’s traits. These are probably the most important things to get right at the start before you start imagining the person’s story, background or anything else.
Knowing that these are the traits of your ideal client will help you choose people based on YOUR expectations of harmonious relationships first and foremost. This will help you sprinkle your magic across everything you do in these relationships, help achieve amazing intentional transformations and results. You will both feel so happy and fulfilled from working together.
What an amazing mindset to make your dreams your reality.
Originally published at medium.com