Memories Not Things

Modern Day Bride & Grooms Saying No Crystal Bowls

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The world is full of things, we see them on billboards, in shop windows, we can find them busting out of every cupboard and closet in some homes. These things are often expensive, and hold our interest for short periods of times. 

As I prepare to get married for the second time, and merge two peoples things into one location. I am astonished and quite frankly a little ashamed at the sheer amount of things we own. Two life times of things, two sets of children, two homes. It is almost obscene.  One of my favorite things about combining our homes is using it as an excuse to get rid of everything, except essentials and to try and live a much more minimalist life. I am not kidding when I say I must have found 8 crystal bowls. This lead me and my fiance to forbidding wedding gifts, which in turn led me to ask other both first time and multiple time newly weds what they really wanted for wedding gifts. 

The answer may surprise you, both first and second time married brides I asked when given the choice of things ( and I gave them some pretty spectacular, vase, art, crystal, silver etc options) chose memories. A hot air balloon ride, a gift card to a special restaurant.  Dan a soon to be groom said his best gift would “be airmiles to travel somewhere special with my lovely fiance Sara”. People loved the idea of receiving date nights, to spend during the first year of marriage, concert tickets, movies and  hotel stays. There are even registries out there now that do nothing but fund, wedding gift cards, honeymoons, or even down payments to a home. 

In a world of overly commercialized wedding ceremonies, overpriced rings and extravagance, it was both refreshing and heartwarming to see, everyone I asked prefered to have memories as gifts. If these engaged couples, continue to make spending time and creating memories with each other a priority, it has to be a good step in making the marriage last.  At the end of the day, the only thing you have left of any deep personal value are memories made with those you love.

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