I don’t know about you, but what I am noticing is that either I am feeling grateful for this time with my kids and partner or I am annoyed. Not surprisingly, this is what I am hearing from other moms, my clients and in my mom support groups.
The common theme is emotions…
So, I want to address how to deal with emotions.
First, the thing with difficult emotions is that it makes us uncomfortable.
When we feel uncomfortable, we either want to escape from it, numb it, or give in to it.
Have you wondered why you do that?
That’s the first place I will invite you to start. Observe, observe, observe. Ask from a place of wonder — why am I reacting this way? When I have taken a step back and asked myself, why am I feeling this way, so many answers just come. The root is revealed. I often will just close my eyes and go inwards. That’s where the answers lie.
Second, there’s a place to process emotions and there’s a place to not process it.
You may or may not have noticed how processing and giving in to emotions makes it worse. I am the queen of processing emotions from my training in my Therapy days…I used to think that understanding how and why I feel the way I do is really important. Yes, it is, but not from the place of merging with the emotions.
You probably already know how addictive emotions are. I was addicted to the emotions of overwhelm, anxiety and fear. Not long ago, when my hubby would travel and I had to manage everything, I would go into a state of overwhelm. Then it would spiral, I would be annoyed and get upset with myself…it was just a disaster!
Can you relate? So, what do we do then, Padma?
Here are a few things that you can do:
- Pause. Breathe. Observe.
- Instead of giving in to the emotion, meet it. Meet it where it is. Face it. Embrace it. Have compassion for what’s getting triggered. It’s easy to bypass, isn’t it? Meeting your issues where you are is the key. Have you seen a child having a melt down? When you hold them and give them space to be with the emotions, they calm down and go on as though nothing happened.
Don’t resist. Just be with the emotion.
- When you notice what’s getting triggered, it’s easiest to work with it. For me the overwhelmed part of me is 5 years old. Imagine her trying to run a home and take care of two other kids. Not happening! That’s what I want you to look at.
- Behind every emotion is a thought. You remember those pesky little neural pathways that I often refer to? Ya, those! We need to change those! Let’s work on changing the thoughts.
Lastly, from a spiritual perspective. Everything is and will always be ok.
Life is exactly where it’s supposed to be. Every trigger, every difficult emotion is an opportunity — an opportunity for freedom. Plus, every emotion carries a vibration, a frequency, that’s how the law of attraction works! Have you heard the phrase, “When it rains it pours”? This is often what’s behind that. That’s for another time, though.
For now, my interpretation of what’s happening currently is that the planet is cleansing. It’s an opportunity to pause, to see what is working and what is not.
What are you doing to process your emotions right now? Share in the comments….