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Insecurities: A Brief Exposé

Check yourself before you wreck yourself (or others).

Everybody has insecurities. The more nuanced they are, the more self awareness is required to detect them.

So stop associating an insecure person with someone inferior or lacking confidence. It’s so much more than that.

Insecurity does not discriminate. I bolded this because it’s a truth so few realize.

Australian models on Instagram have insecurities. Wealthy, white privileged kids that appear to have everything, have insecurities. Presidents of the most powerful nations in the world, have insecurities.

Models are insecure because their monetary worth is placed on their appearance. An increase in weight, a pimple, or a grey hair can be detrimental to their success. Not to mention the overstated level of importance placed on vanity metrics like Instagram followings.

Wealthy white kids are insecure because their accomplishments, no matter the magnitude, will always be downplayed because of where they started from.

Presidents are insecure of the blindspots in their experience or because every aspect of their being is continually torn apart and dissected by the public.

The famous people we idolize have insecurities. God, if they didn’t before, I’m sure getting ridiculed in the comments section of their Instagram posts would definitely bring it out of them.

But those are just generalized inferences. Insecurities get so much more granular than that.

So how do we deal with them? There are a few options. We can either try to cover them up (which is usually our default as humans), or project them onto others in a toxic way, or, we can own them and understand what we can or can’t do to overcome them.

We should really remove the stigma around insecurity. Everyone has them and there’s nothing more refreshing than a person owning up to that and shrugging them off like they’re no big deal.

Sometimes they’re physical, and sometimes they’re below the surface and require you to delve deep to find the root cause.

But it is so powerful once you do. Insecurities can serve as the most detrimental roadblocks, mostly because we’re often unaware they’re even there blocking our path. They can erode our confidence in all areas of our lives.

The worst kind of insecurities are not only self-destructive, but destructive to those around you. You could be reflecting them onto other people in the form of hate or negativity to (ineffectively) make yourself feel better for whatever you lack. 

Write out everything you could possibly be insecure of, starting from your childhood. Then try to identify how you avoid or mask them. For example, someone who is insecure about their introversion may avoid social situations or mask their shyness with liquid courage (alcohol). Then that person should identify a silver lining to focus on whenever he/she feels insecure. It could be that because they’re quiet, their voice is more powerful when they do speak up. It’s rarer than their outspoken counterparts and people assume what they’re saying must be important. 

This kind of internal analysis can have an immensely positive impact on your self-awareness and how you interact with others. Take time to “check yourself before you wreck yourself (or others).” I promise you’ll be a more productive and fulfilled human being because of it. 

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People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.

- MARCUS AURELIUS

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