Deep down there’s a whispering voice saying “I don’t deserve this…”
When things are going well, do you have a gnawing uneasiness? Maybe it shows up with thoughts like:
This is too good to last. Or,
Who am I to deserve this special thing when so many people in the world are suffering?
Maybe these thoughts show up as physical sensations like gnawing guilt, anxiety or fear.
Deep down there’s a whispering voice saying “I don’t deserve this…”
Here’s a startling revelation. You don’t deserve to be happy.
That’s right. You don’t deserve to be happy, but not for the reasons you’ve been thinking.
You don’t have to deserve happiness because it’s already part of who you are and how you were created.
Do you deserve your blood, bones, and muscles? Do you deserve your ability to hear, smell, digest food, or breath? Do you deserve to have your liver work today?
Happiness is already programmed inside you. Your humanity makes you “deserving” of it.
No matter what you have or haven’t been through, happiness is there for you.
Happiness isn’t a reward for good deeds or accomplishments.
Like blood, bones, and muscles, you’re born with happiness in you.
Happiness is a spiritual quality that lives inside of you. Spiritual qualities can’t be lost or destroyed.
Our natural state is harmony and balance which includes a sense of happiness.
That doesn’t mean we don’t do a really good job of covering up our happiness though.
The sun still exists even on a rainy day, right? Even if you barely see it, you know it’s there.
Happiness is the same. If you’ve let your happiness get covered over by clouds, it’s still there, you just aren’t seeing it.
That’s why deserving happiness has nothing to do with what you’ve been through. It’s part of who you are.
It’s time to handle that pesky undeserving voice.
You can try to use your logic to argue with this voice. You may say things like “I deserve to be happy because I’m a good person! I work hard! I earned this!”
How well has that worked? Arguing with the voice only pushes it aside temporarily.
Here’s why. Any nagging, recurring thoughts we have are like small children that just want you to listen to them.
What does a small child do the more you ignore their pleas to be heard? They get louder and louder. Next thing you know there’s a milk experiment in the couch cushions and your keys are flushed down the toilet.
The voices deep within you yearning to be heard won’t go away until you listen to them. They’ll get louder and more persistent until you do.
And while they wait for you to sit with them, they’ll do pesky things like cause you headaches, back pain, stomach problems, and any other host of issues to beg for attention.
They’ll make you depressed, anxious and crabby.
I don’t know about you, but I’d rather get quiet for a few minutes and respectfully listen to my inner concerns than experience all those things.
So, if a little nagging voice inside you says you don’t deserve to be happy, or that happiness is something that happens to other people but not to you, invite that voice to have a chat.
You could have a cup of tea together, go for a walk together, or lie down in bed together. Whatever works for you, invite that voice to hang out for a bit.
Ask the voice “Why do you feel this way?”
Listen like an understanding friend. There’s no judging. Be loving and give this voice the reassurance it needs. The voice is a small child. Treat it the way you needed to be treated when you were a small child.
Keep the dialog open if necessary. Your small inner child may need more than one conversation.
I argue happiness is a responsibility more than something we deserve to have bestowed upon us.
Your happiness is adding to and multiplying the collective happiness of the world.
That’s an important job we all have. The physical world we experience now is far from perfect, but our individual happiness helps the world. It adds to the good.
You being happy doesn’t take away for anyone else’s happiness. It’s not like happiness is a limited resource that can run out.
There’s more than enough happiness for everybody.m
And you, yes you, have permission to be happy.
You may enjoy this post too: Have Your Trained Yourself to Be Unhappy?
I want to send you my free guide, “5 Days to More Peace, More Prosperity, and More Happiness”. Click here to get the guide for free!
Visit me at www.christinebradstreet.com
Originally published at Change Your Mind Change Your Life on Medium.com