You have finally established an intimate relationship with the person you love. You trust each other and have boundaries. You understand how to communicate with each other. But at the same time, you will continue to worry.
Will my lover and I last? How do I know this person really suits me? What if the lover hides some secrets? What if we cannot maintain a healthy and firm relationship?
Continuous concerns like this have a common name: relationship anxiety. It refers to the worry, insecurity, and suspicion that people may suddenly appear even if everything goes smoothly in the intimate relationship. Check here to know to how feel relaxed.
1. Is relationship anxiety normal?
Normal, even according to Astrid Robertson, a psychotherapist who helps couples solve relationship problems, relationship anxiety disorder is very common. Some people experience love anxiety before they start to fall in love, or some people may not be sure if they want to fall in love. After falling in love, some people will have these feelings in a long-term intimate relationship.
Over time, relationship anxiety can lead to:
- Emotional distress
- Lack of motivation
- Fatigue or mental fatigue
- Stomach discomfort and other physical discomfort
Although this relationship anxiety may not be caused by the love relationship itself, it does eventually cause trouble with the intimate relationship.
2. What are the signs of relationship anxiety？
Most people feel insecure about intimacy at some point, especially in the early stages of intimacy, which is very common, so don’t worry too much.
But other relationship anxieties will gradually penetrate into daily life, and it will appear in different ways to different people. However, how to judge whether you are caught in relationship anxiety?
Want to know if you have an influence on your partner?
The most common expression of relationship anxiety is related to “Is it important?”, Which usually indicates a person’s basic needs for belonging and security in intimate relationships.
For example, you may worry about:
If you are not around, will your partner miss you; if serious problems occur, will your partner help or support you; your partner is with you just because you can do something for them, etc.
Doubt your partner’s feelings about yourself
Even if you will express love to each other, even if your partner is always happy to see you, you still cannot get rid of doubts-TA does not really love me. When the partner does not reply to the message within a few hours, when the partner and you are living in a different place … In short, when they suddenly seem a bit far away, you want to confirm whether their feelings have changed many times. In fact, everyone feels this way from time to time, but if this becomes a relationship anxiety, worry will become stubborn.
Worried about partner wanting to break up
Good interpersonal relationships can make people feel loved, safe and happy, so it is normal to want to guard the feeling firmly. But such thoughts can sometimes become a constant fear of the partner leaving. When you are very sensitive, this anxiety can become a problem. For example, you may: when your partner does something that upsets you, you choose to endure; even if the partner does not seem angry, they are worried that they will be angry with you, etc.
Most people feel insecure about intimacy at some point, especially in the early stages of intimacy, which is very common, so don’t worry too much. But other relationship anxieties will gradually penetrate into daily life, and it will appear in different ways to different people. However, how to judge whether you are caught in relationship anxiety?
Want to know if you have an influence on your partner?
The most common expression of relationship anxiety is related to “Is it important?”, Which usually indicates a person’s basic needs for belonging and security in intimate relationships.
For example, you may worry: if your partner is not around, will your partner miss you; if serious problems occur, will your partner help or support you; your partner is with you just because of you What can be done for them, etc.
Doubt your partner’s feelings about yourself, even if you will express love to each other, even if your partner is always happy to see you, but you still can’t get rid of doubts-TA does not really love me. When the partner does not reply to the message within a few hours, when the partner and you are living in a different place … In short, when they suddenly seem a bit far away, you want to confirm whether their feelings have changed many times. In fact, everyone feels this way from time to time, but if this becomes a relationship anxiety, worry will become stubborn.
Worried about your partner wanting to break up? Good interpersonal relationships can make people feel loved, safe and happy, so it’s normal to want to guard your feelings firmly. But such thoughts can sometimes become a constant fear of the partner leaving. When you are very sensitive, this anxiety can become a problem. For example, you may: when your partner does something that upsets you, you choose to endure; even if the partner does not seem angry, they are worried that they will be angry with you, etc.
3. How to overcome relationship anxiety?
Although this does require some time and effort, it is not until you can make yourself feel that everything is fine, this intimate relationship is relatively safe, stable and sustainable. If possible, resolve relationship anxiety as soon as possible to avoid more problems.
Keep yourself and independent
As you get closer to your partner, you may find that key parts of your identity, personality, and even independence have changed, making many sacrifices for your partner and this relationship. Admittedly, part of the break-in is necessary, but losing one’s self-awareness or giving up independence will not benefit you both and the relationship. Remember, the reason your partner wants to be with you has a lot to do with “you are you”, so you should keep yourself.
Try to appreciate
Focus on what is happening now, not worry about things that are invisible and those that will happen in the future. Although we cannot guarantee the duration of a relationship, isn’t the best thing you can do during this time is to appreciate and enjoy it?
Reminisce about beautiful experiences
For example, happy wedding moments, shiny wedding shoes, with sequins, translucent light, remember that such a beautiful memory, remember the commitment at that time. More memories of the beautiful experience that both parties have experienced together, can be overcome to some extent Anxious.