Community//

How to Overcome Angerness

Feeling angry is weird. It’s the merchandise of putting an excessive amount of importance on one thing, most frequently once it’s out of your management. •    Hurt •    Let down •    Misled •    Under-performing •    Overwhelmed Yet, every one of those things has AN underlying ‘anger identifier’ that is more important than the feeling itself. […]

The Thrive Global Community welcomes voices from many spheres. We publish pieces written by outside contributors with a wide range of opinions, which don’t necessarily reflect our own. Community stories are not commissioned by our editorial team, and though they are reviewed for adherence to our guidelines, they are submitted in their final form to our open platform. Learn more or join us as a community member!

Feeling angry is weird.

It’s the merchandise of putting an excessive amount of importance on one thing, most frequently once it’s out of your management.

•    Hurt

•    Let down

•    Misled

•    Under-performing

•    Overwhelmed

Yet, every one of those things has AN underlying ‘anger identifier’

that is more important than the feeling itself. Let’s 918kiss dig deeper:

This either suggests that you hurt yourself and you’re angry regarding it as a result of you’re in pain, or somebody else hurt you and you is angry with them as a result.

Your anger is just creating the pain worse, therefore it’s best to require a deep breath, calm down, and re-assess.

If someone else hurts you in a non-physical way (emotional, psychological, or spiritual), often the feeling of ‘hurt’ is rooted in having an expectation that does not belong.

Get eliminate expectations and anger can accompany them.

This means you’ve placed importance on somebody else following through with their word or actions.

Effectively, you’ve set an expectation for someone else to help you or do something, and now they haven’t.

Rather than seeing it as their failure, think about your finish goal: to be happy, loving, and live a meaningful life.

As it turns out, asking or expecting other people to do stuff for you is in direct conflict with your end goal. It’s a misguided strategy.

Someone or something either deliberately or accidentally misled you. Whether this is a sign on the road that sent you in the wrong direction or someone who purposely tricked you into buying something you couldn’t afford, the responsibility ultimately lies with you. You see, this is another form of expectation.

When we depend on our environments to stay in the United States stable, we tend to quickly become unstable if things don’t go as planned.

When we depend on ourselves for stability, happiness, and love, we glance inward and notice another feeling.

If we’re currently late, or occupation the incorrect direction, we laugh it off and learn for the future.

There’s nothing we can do about it now, so may as well see it for what it is: a mistake.

Sometimes, when we are under-performing at work or home, we get angry with ourselves or a loved one.

When we area unit angry with ourselves, we tend to become isolated, thereby moving aloof from our finish life goal.

If we are angry with someone else due to them ‘under-performing’, this means we’ve again allowed ourselves to expect.

Remove expectations from your life to maneuver nearer to your goal of a cheerful, loving, and meaningful life.

Internally, we tend to might have set AN expectation to get on time for work, school, or a family event.

Externally, there could be traffic, a car accident, or a phone call that comes through and makes us late.

Because we tend to set the expectation to get on time and that we area unit currently late, we feel we’ve let ourselves — or whomever we are meeting — down.

Again, this can be stock-still in having expectations, instead of appreciating each moment for what it is.

You might notice a common theme.

The anger you’re experiencing presumably comes from AN expectation.

And since expectations area unit a failing strategy for a cheerful, loving, and meaningful life, they are the culprit, ‘not’ the situation.

You don’t expose your power, letting yourself become victim to circumstances and situations that make you feel uncentered.

You no longer have to be angry.

If you’d like to treat people around you with more patience and respect — or you simply want to feel better and less angry — work on expectations first. Identify when you feel angry, figure out why, and see if there’s another way of thinking about the situation in the future.

Remove expectations once you see them and note of however you’re feeling once you have.

I suspect your anger will melt away…

Share your comments below. Please read our commenting guidelines before posting. If you have a concern about a comment, report it here.

You might also like...

Community//

How to Overcome Angerness

by hamza fazal
Wisdom//

Anger

by World Health: Dr. Kareem
antonioiacobelli/ Getty Images
Well-Being//

Is Anger Therapy Right For You? Tips for Controlling Your Anger

by Ladan Nikravan Hayes

Sign up for the Thrive Global newsletter

Will be used in accordance with our privacy policy.

Thrive Global
People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.

- MARCUS AURELIUS

We use cookies on our site to give you the best experience possible. By continuing to browse the site, you agree to this use. For more information on how we use cookies, see our Privacy Policy.