When I met the Italian, I knew within me that he was ‘the one’. After sometime, I sat down and wanted to figure out what were the tangible things he did that said to me he was my soul mate versus just another great guy. And yes, there is a difference. Here are my 5 pointers that helped me in differentiating between a good guy and ‘the one’.

  1. Watching him cut vegetables (doing cooking-related stuff). He had asked me out on a date and that date was him cooking me a meal. Watching him was not just a huge turn on but I found him so attractive being in his element.
  2. He loves me in his casuals. I remember once, in the middle of the night, we went out for a walk. I had nothing casual to wear so I wore his t-shirt and shorts. I liked the fact that he loved me in his clothes.
  3. My smell lingers in his apartment. I was staying over and when I left in the morning my smell was all around his flat (he said). He said he could still feel me around. On the bed, there were pieces of my hair and I felt bad cause I hate that my hair falls but he was so fine with it.
  4. He’d drink from my glass. While this may sound like nothing but to me, if early on, he picks up my glass of water and drinks it like it’s a natural thing to do then you know he’s not only comfortable with you, he feels close to you. We were in a restaurant and he went for my glass of water, I found it endearing and smiled.
  5. When the silence is comfortable. I remember spending nights with him, cuddled up and I’d be happy talking or not. With him, I don’t feel awkward when there is silence. I actually find it comforting and I feel so connected to him.

These are things that seem like nothing but that’s exactly the point – it’s the nothingness that matters. If you can enjoy each other in the ‘nothingness’ then this is something so very special.

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