descriptive

It’s hard to change. Maybe that’s why we humans work so hard to defend our beliefs and actions. What’s the alternative? We act and think from deep grooves created by years of repetition; for some of us, a lot of years. That, plus the failure we remember from the past, makes the idea of change feel pretty daunting. But if instead we thought of change as the “leaving behind” of something we don’t need anymore, as “letting go” of some habit that no longer serves us, something that we’ve reexamined and deemed unnecessary and even harmful, maybe real change could be possible. This past year we’ve all been challenged in ways different from ever before. For some of us, those challenges have given us the opportunity to get a glimpse of another possibility. Maybe the change in circumstances has thrown us back onto ourselves, creating “speed bumps” that have allowed us to see what it could be like without some aspect of our personality, an aspect that we now might be ready to leave behind.

If that were the case, then that window of opportunity is closing soon. Once enough of us are vaccinated and things start to get “back to normal,” when the speed bumps are removed from our road, the momentum of our lives will carry us away, the way it always has, and our chance to make use of the lessons learned might be lost. So I’m going to reach out and grab this opportunity with both hands. I’m even going to try and publish my intention. Maybe if I tell enough people what it is, my chances for success will be that much greater. I’m going to leave behind competition.

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I don’t aspire to be a self-sacrificing saint. I’m not talking about putting others ahead of myself like some mechanical martyr. I’m talking about seeing the whole picture and recognizing that competition just isn’t needed; it isn’t true. There’s no need for me be concerned about another person’s opinion of me because I know what I am. There’s no need for me to struggle to be heard. I’ve been heard enough. There’s no need for me to beat someone else to anything. I have everything I need. I may even have a little extra for someone else who thinks they don’t. Respect doesn’t add anything to my experience, so if you don’t respect me, it doesn’t matter. I have gotten enough attention, so if you get the spotlight, that’s okay. I may reach out to you from a place of recognition of our commonality and my fortunateness. But I will not reach out from the need to prove something, or from the need to assert my superiority. I’m not superior. I’m just fortunate, and I don’t need to compete with you anymore.

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