I often like to look back at far I’ve come with my confidence and it is a looooooong way!
What I do notice though, is all the times I’ve allowed my confidence to be knocked by people close to me.
I have a great business idea – sharp intake of breath
I’m going to do “X” – Ooooo I wouldn’t if I were you!
I’m planning this.. Oh, so and so did that and it was a disaster
Sometimes they may even laugh at your ideas
And these reactions have really made me doubt myself.
That has HELD ME BACK in the past.
These people closest you to aren’t trying to undermine your confidence.
When they give you reactions like this, it comes from and place of protectiveness but also ignorance.
I don’t mean ignorance in a mean way, just that they don’t actually KNOW how you’ll be able to achieve what you want, because THEY don’t know how THEY would do it!
They CAN’T see your vision, because it isn’t theirs. People get very scared and dismissive when they don’t KNOW how to do things,
Also, they are likely worried that your “big idea” won’t work and you’ll suffer from feelings of failure, or risk everything.
It comes from place of care.
BUT
They are NOT you.
They DON’T have your vision or ideas
The absolute WORST CASE SCENARIO rarely happens, it’s normally somewhere midway between the BEST and WORST case scenarios when things go pear shaped.
FAILURE is just FEEDBACK, you can learn from it, and figure out the right approach from it.
Here’s some things you can do to help protect your confidence in these situations:
1. Chose who you tell your ideas to. Don’t take business advice from someone who doesn’t have a successful business. Don’t take money advice from someone who has none. Speak to people who have what you want and can encourage you.
2. Remember that the reactions you get are a reflection of THEIR thoughts about THEIR own abilities around this idea, not yours.
3. Some people, fear that you will move away from them if you are more successful, so this may be driving their response.
4. Take small and consistent action everyday day to work on your ideas and goals, do it quietly until it’s done. Remember to look back at how far you have come as well as looking forward.
5. Don’t beat yourself up, all success comes from making errors that you learn from – as children, we have no fear of failure and as a result we learn to walk, talk, all sorts of things – failure is FEEDBACK – learn from it.
Your idea may not work, but what if it did?
What if it only half worked – could you build on that?
One thing is for sure:
You are GUARANTEED to miss 100% of the chances you don’t take.