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Don’t let negativity and self-sabotage hold you hostage

If you started the New Year full of good intentions to make positive lifestyle changes but now find yourself struggling to stay motivated, you are not alone. The good news is that it’s not your fault – you simply need to reframe your thinking to get back on track.

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The thing I’ve noticed most during over a decade of helping people to lose weight is that after a few weeks of beginning the latest “new thing,” the excitement and buzz wear off and fear and panic set in.

So many people blame themselves for sabotaging their own weight-loss or indeed any other self-improvement journey. They say: “What’s wrong with me?”, “Why can’t I just do this?”, “What’s my problem?”. The destructive little voice in your head starts up again: “You’ll never succeed” or “You always fail, what’s so different this time?” or “What if I don’t lose weight?” or “What will people think if I fail again?”

Well, if this happens to you, I can tell you that you’re not alone, and it’s not your fault. The first thing to do is stop blaming yourself. Negativity and self-sabotage are common problems but they CAN be stopped.

This has been happening over and over again for many years because things that you’ve put your trust in have let you down. It’s why so many people yo-yo diet. Willpower fades and they just can’t continue. Then, they try and fail again and again. This cycle then becomes a habit or gets worse because psychology gets involved, it develops into a fear of failure, and then self-limiting beliefs develop too.

Of course there can be many things at the root of all this, but when it keeps on happening over and over again it’s so frustrating and really doesn’t do your mental health or your efforts to lose weight any good whatsoever.

I want to explain briefly why self-sabotage happens and then help you find solutions. We all know that this problem isn’t something that has just started recently. This will have been going on for a long time and it’s really important that you stop and think about why – and when – it happens, and what the trigger is. It’s all about mind management. When you stop and think rather than getting upset and panicky, you can change things. When you make a decision to stop letting self-sabotage control you, you won’t repeat the same pattern of yo-yo dieting over and over again. You can be free of all that and move your life forward.

It all comes down to just one moment in time, which is NOW. Today you can interrupt this pattern and activate your freedom by choosing to think differently. It’s about choice, which is something we all have. We don’t have to be held hostage to our minds. We can take control and believe and trust in ourselves so that our fears and our beliefs don’t define us.

Sometimes lack of self-worth is at the heart of this and people have lost sight of their purpose in life. There is simply no big ‘why’ or big enough reason for wanting to lose weight; it’s just something that you feel you should do. This is the thing that holds so many people back and it stops motivation in its tracks. When there’s no purpose, there’s no motivation. But there is a purpose: your health. Your health is the most important thing and you need to dig deep and start trusting yourself, and believing that this is the moment you take control.

Never before has it been so important to be healthy and look after yourself. The only thing stopping you from taking action is your own mind. You don’t need to succumb to self-sabotage; if you know it’s happening, you can power through and succeed.

My challenge to you is to stop. Understand that your brain has been hijacked by negativity, and then prevent the negativity from taking control.

Our thoughts really matter because our minds and bodies are linked.

We need to give ourselves kind messages and be nice to ourselves because otherwise we’ll find ourselves going round and round in circles and getting nowhere fast.

You must change the script of your life right now so that the soap opera in your mind isn’t on repeat all your life. Be aware when your brain is being hijacked by negativity and reframe the thoughts.

Treat these negative moments as obstacles in life’s journey: keep calm and carry on!

This is about believing in yourself; about trusting yourself and having faith that you can bash through the self-doubt – and knock down that negative voice in your head!

Have the courage and you will reap the reward.

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