Coping With Grief in Unexpected Ways

After losing my daughter, I turned to writing.

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After my daughter, Elianna passed away I found the gift of writing. writing is a heartfelt way to help shed light on our own personal journeys which is healing to the soul. Words can help comfort and instill hope to other grieving parents who are also experiencing tremendous pain and heartache from child loss. Writing can help with grief recovery because we are writing in honor of our children. I have found peace and harmony through writing to which I feel a closeness with my daughter in spirit. This internal change allows a person to shed greatness unto others. We should not hide behind our grief but embrace it because, in time, we become part of it. We are then able to bridge the gap and connect to those through writing who have experienced similar losses.

The world needs a better understanding of life and death. Certain experiences need to be talked about and written about. Life can be of healing when we are able to write from the heart. Living with sadness helps soften the words as we write because the words appear from deep within us where our pain lies. We can help bring love to others through writing because the sadness of a heavy heart is linked to so many emotions including love.

When we suffer tremendous loss, we experience a whirlwind of emotions and one of these emotions is anger. I know from losing my daughter, Elianna part of this anger helped turn my life around and gave me the drive and motivation to accomplish so much. Anger can be fueled into positive energy if we allow it to. I became very angry during the first 2 – 3 years after Elianna’s tragic passing but in time I was able to turn my anger into positive energy. I was not angry with God. I was angry with a few people in my life who did not reach out and sadly turned their backs. I still have no contact with these few people to this day but I do realize some people are meant to be part of our journey and others are meant to stand on the sidelines or fade into the distance. All in all, we learn from one another. As my journey unfolded I forgave them. I knew that if I did not forgive it would be impossible for me to move on.

Once in a while, a part of me feels this residue of anger but it no longer engulfs me instead it acts as a subtle reminder and a motivation to write.

We can master our grief and make friends with it while moving on and at the same time reach others with comforting words instilling empathy and hope.

When we experience death at close hand, such as the death of a child then we can master anything. Once we find the meaning and purpose in such tragedies, we begin to find the truth and understanding and as we open our hearts we then can share our pain with others.

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