We are all aging. Every one of us, every minute of every day. We will never be chronologically younger than we are at this moment.
The good news is how we handle it will determine if we grow old or if we become ageless. Becoming ageless happens when we shift our perspective.
Ageless means ‘being of all generations, not aging or appearing to age’.
As a young woman, I admired women who went grey naturally. Exuding an aura of wisdom and youthful curiosity they seemed to be shrouded in mystery, holding a secret behind the twinkle in their eyes. I wanted to know what allowed them to be so confident and free.
Years later as my grey began to appear I lacked the courage to let it be. I was not ready to become the women I was meant to be. I struggled. The ramifications seemed immense. I work in an image and youth-oriented business. Ageism is rampant. Was I endangering my livelihood?
So, like millions of women, I colored the grey. Momentarily I felt better…and yet I felt like a spiritual charlatan for hiding my true self. The dread of exposure was always hanging over me.
When I finally made the decision to let my grey shine, most of my friends were shocked.
To their reactions, I responded: ” I am doing it so I can speak my truth”.
The need to come to terms with my own aging was crucial for my journey of self-realization. Acceptance of who I am, naked, without adornments was imperative. I needed to face myself without shame. It was not easy. At times catching a glimpse of a reflection, I was unrecognizable to myself… who was that old woman?
To want to look youthful is not an issue, masking it behind a facade of fear is. Acknowledging what prevents us from owning our years is essential to our spiritual growth.
‘Instead of being girls, girls as long as possible, who then age humiliatingly into middle-aged women, they can become women much earlier – and remain active adults, enjoying the long, erotic career of which women are capable, far longer. Women should allow their faces to show the lives they have lived. Women should tell the truth.’
Susan Sontag – The Double Standard of Aging (1972
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When I Let Go of the pressure to stay young, I was liberated. It was my ticket to freedom.
The secret those women knew so many years ago was knowing they did not need society’s permission to Be. They followed the course of nature, flowing with the change of seasons, understanding the power of renewal, regrowth, and resilience.
The energy they exuded, crossed generations. There is nothing more attractive or sexy than someone living their truth.
Nothing in nature stands still so why should we?
By becoming ageless the need for others to define us ceases to exist. We can stand tall, wearing the scars and evidence of our years with pride.
On Becoming Ageless:
My vision has improved. I now see qualities like kindness, gratitude, empathy, and compassion more than I see physical traits. I can see another’s journey without judgment, but rather with tolerance and understanding.
My sense of hearing has been heightened. I can hear words that are unspoken. Those words between the lines or those yet unformulated.
I have become more flexible. Ancient trees who have lived hundreds or thousands of years have become my teachers. They may stand upright or twisted from their experiences, but they bend and sway with the winds, having learned to be rigid will only break their branches.
I have become stronger. As with trees each year they grow stronger and more resilient, so do I. Sharp words no longer cut me, nor can the daggers from angry eyes pierce my skin. I have not toughened, but rather has become like flowing water.
I can nourish myself. As trees drop their leaves to nourish the ground I too have learned to nurture myself. When thoughts enter my mind which do not serve my higher good, I let them go.
And, so I have become softer. I have learned the softest of touch can affect the deepest healing.
With the decision to go natural, I felt a profound sense of peace. It was as if my souls’ purpose was screaming out to the Universe, I got it! I am whole and complete and perfect as I am.
To Become who we are meant to be means to Let Go of who we once were. Doing so with grace and acceptance, the becoming is effortless.
The idea is to die young… as late as possible
~ unknown