Societal influences that sound like compliments, but really they are just insidious and sneaky ways we are judged and judge others. We are brainwashed and we don’t even know it.
It is meant to make us always feel, even if it’s just a little, not good enough – especially as women. That is why beauty and weight-loss are billion-dollar industries.
Here is just a small list below.
“Wow, did you lose weight, you look amazing.” Translation – Before I thought you looked fatter and fat is bad.
“OMG, I could never wear that, you look gorgeous.” Translation –Skinny is good, fat is bad.
“You are so thin! Do you even eat? I wish I was thin like you.” Translation – Skinny is good, fat is bad. God forbid if we are considered fat.
“What did you do to your skin? You look ten years younger.” Translation – Looking older is not good. Aging is bad.
“Your hair is gorgeous without all that gray.” Translation – Again, having gray hair means getting older and aging is bad.
“How old are you? Really, no way!” Translation – Aging is bad! Ageism is a real thing people, especially for women!
“Wow, you are a stay at home mom, I envy you, Omg I HAVE to work.” Translation – Being a mom is not considered an important job. Actually, it’s the most important job raising other humans but that is another post.
“I wish I could work outside the home like you, you are so lucky, but how do you do it with kids?” Translation – You don’t spend enough time with your kids, you must NOT be a good mom.
“Wow, I wish I was single like you, you don’t have to deal with all the challenges of relationships.” Translation – OMG, what is wrong with you that you don’t have a partner?
“God, sometimes I wish I had that kind of freedom like you, did you not have kids because YOU DID NOT want them? Count yourself lucky.” Translation – What kind of a woman doesn’t want kids?
These are just a few of the tiny insidious ways in which we are told we aren’t good enough, I am sure you could add to the list.
Have you either said it yourself and others or had it said to you? I know I have.
Don’t buy into the BS. Life is too short. Be whoever you want to be! Be your own UNIQUE amazing self. You’re good enough, I promise…
Blessings ~ Melisa