I am a first generation Mexican-American, born and raised in California, and proud of it.
Matt (my fiancé) was born in Iowa, in the Middle of America.
Matt is an only child.
I am the oldest of 7.
We come from completely different parts of the world, completely different cultures, and we were raised differently. In many parts of the world, it may be perceived that we are not a match. However, we are complete and utter soulmates. Our core values align, how we speak to each other, the love for each other, the integrity we have for ourselves, completely aligns.
Even though I come from a Mexican household and he comes from an American household, we have agreed that we are going to figure out whatever comes our way. He has loved getting to know my family and culture. He is enjoying learning spanish because he wants to. I chuckle at family gatherings when my family asks me why I haven’t taught Matt Spanish. First of all, I don’t love this question because it implies that there is something wrong or lacking with him for not learning or me for not teaching. So, I return the question to them, and say “why should he?” They quickly replied that if he spoke Spanish, they could talk to him. At which point I quickly reply, so why don’t you learn English? This may sound rude or cruel, but I am helping reframe their brain to show that it does not always have to switch over to “your convenience.”
We do the same thing when his mom says something that is not kind about my family or culture or upbringing. Why? Because our interracial love is here to expand love into the world, to deal with whatever issue comes up, knowing that it is always us against that issue, and never me against him.