Well-Being//

Body Positivity is More Than Just Appearance

A therapist says it's about so much more than what you see in the mirror.

Courtesy of Shutterstock
Courtesy of Shutterstock

“It’s bathing suit season — time to lose that extra weight.”

“Get the perfect beach body with this new workout.”

These messages often flood social media, TV, and radio each year when summer rolls around. Numerous studies link body dissatisfaction (for both women and men) to mass media. We have been conditioned to believe our self-worth comes from our physical appearance.

Societal norms have been born out of “diet culture,” a $60 billion dollar industry that continues to convince society that the “perfect body” is the key to being likable and successful. Diet culture continues to reinforce the irrational belief that your value as a person is determined by the shape of your body.

Body-positive messaging, however, struggles to overcome these harmful norms.

What is Negative Body Messaging?

As a therapist, I specialize in those struggling with eating disorders, poor body image, or both. I am all too familiar with the negative body messages people, and especially women, hear day in and day out. “You’re fat,” “You ate too much today,” “You need to lose those last 10 lbs,” and “I am never going to be good enough,” might sound all too familiar.

Your self-esteem and belief that you are worth more than your physical appearance can be harmed by these body-shaming messages. Finding peace and a positive body image can feel impossible while being surrounded by these messages or being plagued by these thoughts yourself. Unfortunately, this negativity is reinforced multiple times a day through magazines in the checkout line, social media, daily conversation, and beyond.

What is Body Positivity and How Do You Work Toward it?

Body positivity goes beyond what your body looks like physically. This positivity comes from several different factors, including:

  • Believing in yourself — when you believe in yourself, you might not need the constant reassurance to validate your decision-making. You own a sense of confidence that no one can take away from you.
  • Trusting your body — when you trust your body, you trust that taking care of your body means it’s going to take care of you.
  • Feeling proud of what you accomplish each day — this may sound silly, but feeling proud of yourself is leads to feeling positive about your body. When you feel proud you feel accomplished, strong, and believe in yourself.
  • Having a happy and balanced relationship with food and exercise — when you don’t feel like you have to control what you are (or aren’t) eating, and you don’t hold the belief you have to stick to a workout schedule no matter what, a balanced relationship with food and exercise is much easier.

Tips for Creating Body Positivity

Now that we’ve established what body positivity is, here are some tips for creating body positivity in your day-to-day life:

Replacing negative thoughts

Although it can be difficult to replace negative thoughts, being mindful and aware of those thoughts can help make a habit of challenging them. For example, reminding yourself of things like: “I am going to do my best today and that’s enough,” “It’s ok to skip the gym tonight if I’m too tired,” and “I don’t have to order the salad, I can order what I am feeling hungry for,” can help diminish negative thoughts about your body.

Letting go of the ‘shoulds’

Pay attention to how often you are saying “should” and “shouldn’t” to yourself. “Should” statements are full of judgment, potentially setting you up to feel like you are not good enough or have failed at something. “Shouldn’t” statements can keep you from doing what is best for yourself physically and mentally.

Permission to feel proud

Practice allowing yourself to fully feel proud about something you accomplished and own it. This remains true for accomplishments of any size, like just getting through a tough day.

Practicing gratitude

Find something each day to express gratitude for. Research has found that being grateful and practicing gratitude increases your overall well-being. It decreases the chance of depression, anxiety, and substance abuse. Gratitude can increase your satisfaction with life and allow you to experience an increase in happiness. Practicing gratitude can influence how positively you feel about yourself.

Although we started off talking about “bathing suit season” and the impact of societal messages, body positivity is an important practice all year round. Recognizing how society continues to impact how we feel about ourselves and being aware of negative thoughts is a huge step forward toward finding peace.

Body positivity is about loving and appreciating yourself everyday. It means talking kindly to yourself, listening to what your body is telling you, and fully believing in yourself. Doing this for year round can help you feel happier and more positive in every season. It’s about simply being comfortable being YOU. And remember, there’s no wrong way to have a body.

Originally published on Talkspace

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