“The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.”Maureen Dowd, Op-Ed columnist for The New York times and winner of the Pulitzer Prize for distinguished commentary
I know a couple who were downsizing after their children were grown. They bought a house in which they’re not really happy, in a neighborhood they dislike, all because they were unwilling to keep looking for the house they really wanted. They convinced themselves that the house and neighborhood were ‘good enough’. What a shame they settled for second best especially as an older couple! In the parlance of my baseball loving husband, settling for good enough is the same as settling for the cheap seats for a major league game. You aren’t happy sitting way up where you can’t really see or enjoy the game. You’ve cheated yourself out of getting the best that you can.
As luck would have it, a few months later they saw a house they would have loved in the area in which they had wanted to live. To make matters worse, it fell well within the same price range as the house they had just bought. If they had waited and kept looking they would not have had to settle for ‘the cheap seats’. They defeated their own goal by not trying to find what would make them happy. We all know people whose attitude in life is more than a little on the negative side. They are ‘settlers’. Rather than expect the good things in life, they are willing to settle for ‘good enough’ in places to live, second careers, cars, and even relationships. They give up too easily and never really get what they do want. ‘Cheap seats’ and happiness are not a good mix.
Getting the best for yourself has everything to do with self-love and the knowledge that you deserve having the best you can get. Knowing that you are worth having what will make you happier is not selfish, it is simply common sense. To get the best often means that you have to be determined to follow your heart and counsel and not simply settle for less.
What you are actually doing by settling for life’s cheap seats is giving yourself permission to take only second-best in every area of your life from friendships to careers. Sometimes it comes down to lack of self-worth—you feel, erroneously, that you don’t deserve anything better—that getting what you want is something for other people. Stop it! You deserve the best you can get.
Remember that quote at the top of this article? “The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.”
It is one that you should remember every time you think sitting in the cheap seats is an acceptable alternative. Be satisfied to satisfy yourself and never settle for anything that is only good enough.
© copyright 2019 Kristen Houghton all rights reserved