Workaholism Can Ruin Your Relationships

When I was 12 my father met with an accident and got paralyzed and my mother had to take care of the home and financial matters. Dad was alive but cannot support us emotionally or financially. Soon I realized that my mom has too many responsibilities so I decided to help her out in every possible way.

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Story of my life

Being the elder brother, I started taking care of my siblings and along with my studies and other routine stuff. When I passed my 12th grade I started my career in an IT firm, I was energetic and willing to give extra time. That constant thought of helping my mom never let me compromise on my work. After a year I got selected for a scholarship program for higher studies and my company asked me to join some institution for my Bachelor’s degree.

It was a golden moment for me and my family. My mother was extremely happy. Soon I started my studies and along with my job. It was hectic –in fact very very hectic but I got used to of such tough routine and in that chase four years passed so quickly.

Everything was not as good as it seems

I got appointed as a manager and things were on the right track. I never realized that everything was not OK. There was something very wrong that was badly disturbing my health and psychological condition.

Soon I started feeling that rather than loving me back for my efforts my family is keeping me away. They stopped sharing things with me, they stopped being siblings and have become strangers. Either we had routine work talks or had no talks at all. Even my mother was not the same. 

I always had a very limited number of friends, they were also not standing with me in my good time. Either we had no communication or have heated discussions about things. With success, loneliness was also coming to me but I had no idea why people are being like that.

Haifa and my  life

Until the day I met Haifa, she was an intern in my office, very energetic, humble and sweet. She always had a smile on her face soon she became a friend of most of the staff members. One day after a meeting with the client I asked about her family life. Her responses just turned my life. Her story was more problematic them mine, she had many problems in her life even worst then mine but still, she uses to smile a lot. She uses to have good relations with people around her. Simply saying she had a life and I don’t.

This realization broke me from inside, that night was restless. The whole night I was thinking about what I have a good memory?  I was empty-handed, no family bonds, no friends, no me time, no traveling,  no girlfriend, no smiles, no good memories.

Though I had responsibilities and I was trying my best to support the people around me but still there was a big blank space. I wondered why, why, why…

I went to Haifa again, invited her for coffee and discusses my problem, she smiled and replied because you are WORKAHOLIC. She said my mood swings, constant anger, irritation in my words and work talks all time etc are not letting the people around me to share their emotions. Her words,

“you are not saying, so you are not getting heard. You are not listening so not getting loved” 

It was true. I was so much busy with work. Soo much.. all the time.

Solutions to my problems

I started searching for ways which can minimize my workload without disturbing my clients. I found Digitech Outsourcing Solutions on the internet. Their 24×7 phone answering services, track record of all messages and follow up calls services helped me a lot. Now I have time for myself, family and friends. I was not that much stressed, I was not feeling irritated all the time.

I fixed my work hours and asked my company to provide me with an assistant. Haifa also suggested me to visit a psychologist for stress and anger management course. Her advice was helpful, two months course changed from inside. I learned to say NO to extra work, I learned to maintain an equilibrium between my work and personal life. To bring my family and friends back to my life, I started some spending some quality time with them. Small trips to nearby cities refreshed my mind. Things are better than before and becoming more good day after day.

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