What Is your Happiness Invested In Gorgeous Goddess?
I had mine invested in my 6 pack. When I finally got my 6 pack abs, I was SO SO happy. I was the in the best physical shape of my life. I had done it. Got my “perfect” body. I felt so amazing. Confident! Happy! Alive! I loved me.
Or so I thought.
Amongst my 3hr a day training schedule, my “strict” eating and my relentless work schedule….. I fell pregnant.
Completely an unplanned surprise. Up the duff. Knocked up. Bun in the oven.
After the shock wore off and the excitement kicked in, I was then hit with another truth bomb.
MY BODY WAS ABOUT TO DRASTICALLY CHANGE… FAST.
I was also in a high risk pregnancy category so had to pull back the exercise levels I was used to. This news cut me like a knife.
What was I going to do to maintain this body?
I then went into a MASSIVE toasted ham and cheese sandwich phase to get through the nausea. Load up those toasties people and throw them at me. YUM!
My 6 pack was well and truly gone. There was a sense of relief knowing I didn’t have to worry about holding my stomach in, seeing as I was growing a cheeky and amazing human. So my worry was eased WHILE PREGNANT.
Don’t get me wrong, I adored being pregnant. Every damn minute of it.
But after I gave birth to my darling Maddox, it didn’t take long to realize that my 6 pack DID NOT embed self love and happiness into me. Because I now lacked that previous “high” I had with a “perfect” body and crazy workout schedule prior.
I had a void. I FELT A VOID.
I was so so chuffed to be a new Mum again and so much happiness and joy surrounded that. But when it came to my own self-love….I was lacking.
My 6pack had gone
And so had my “self love”!!
What had happened to my sparkle? My unlimited energy?
Was it because I had not long pushed out my bundle of love and was exhausted? Or was it because I knew my 6 pack had gone and I had invested and relied on my happiness and self love through my physical self and now it had hit me?
This massive inner earth quake has been THE best light bulb moment I have ever had. Boy do I wish I had’ve grabbed onto this sooner.
Because now, without a 6pack, I love me. I love my body. I love WHO I am not WHAT I look like. I love how I FEEL not how I look.
So let me ask you this…..ARE YOU BANKING ON AN OUTER CHANGE TO GET YOUR SELF LOVE, CONFIDENCE + HAPPINESS???
That “when” conversation you have with your Inner Bully.
WHEN I lose weight i’ll feel confident.
WHEN I fit into my skinny jeans I’ll be happy.
WHEN I’m a size (fill in the blank) I will be able to find love.
WHEN I get plastic surgery I’ll be beautiful.
Because let me drop a truth bomb my darling Goddess…. your outside self does NOT guarantee you will cement in your own love, happiness or confidence.
It’s a slippery slope and an endless battle to maintain your outer self to keep your happiness etc. And you perceive yourself to be ticking all your boxes and have your shiz together WHILE that outer self is maintained.
It’s not real.
It’s not sustainable.
There’s a void. A rut. A gap.
And I felt it. But ignored it…..because I had the “perfect” body, why would I still have an emptiness when I had abs?
What are you wanting to change to “be happy.”?
What you are putting yourself through to arrive at your “perfect”?
What things are you shutting out or ignoring so you can focus on changing your body only?
If you stop, and ask yourself AM I HONESTLY FILLED TO THE BRIM WITH SELF LOVE, can you say “Hell YES I am.”???
All the feelings you are waiting to have WHEN you arrive at your weight, your size, your success, your fitness level, your relationship status……you can have those NOW.
Why are you putting yourself off until WHEN? Because when you get your “when”, it won’t last anyway.
Enough is enough !
Self hate only gets you so far which your Inner Bully loves feeding from.
Self love is your forever. Why not give her a go and go on a date.
Here are 3 sure fire ways to crack open your self love nutshell:
2. TALK TO YOURSELF AS YOU WOULD YOUR BEST FRIEND:
you know when your best gal pal is having a low moment and tells you
“I’m fat. I’m just gross. I’m such an idiot”?
And you quickly reaffirm her with “no way babe. You are so gorgeous and smart and so so amazing. I am so proud of you.”??
That’s how you need to speak to yourself when you catch yourself out putting the gorgeous YOU down. Just as you would your bestie.
Affirm with love, even when it feels awkward. Keep going my lovely. This is a game changer. Be persistent.
3. FOCUS ON YOUR PURPOSE:
get away from worrying so much about how you look and start to venture into how you can contribute to this world? Your voice, your passion, your lessons …..what are they? Discover what lights you up my love and do more of that. Because you are wasting an average of a whole year out of your life worrying about not being good enough or wanting to change your body. Hating yourself. Imagine what you could do in that year!!
Start your transition to loving yourself from the inside and the outside will reflect this. In health. In glow. In confidence. ALWAYS.
Be patient my gorgeous girl and accept this self love shift is a journey…not a destination.
Continue to feel that thirst for more empowerment and more ways to inject self love and your life will completely change. I guarantee it!
Much Love and Empowerment,
Originally published at medium.com