Decide What Constitutes Success
“I celebrate myself, and sing myself, and what I assume you shall assume, for every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.” — Walt Whitman
It was Jiddu Krishnamurti, regarded as one of the greatest thinkers and religious teachers of all time who once wrote: “The more you know yourself the more clarity there is. Self-knowledge has no end — you don’t come to an achievement, you don’t come to a conclusion. It is an endless river.”
Do you think he was right when he says: self-knowledge leads to clarity? What about you? What do you know about yourself now with greater clarity? It’s reassuring to celebrate ourselves since our reality is the embodiment of our thoughts. If we believe in our worthiness to achieve success, we will attract it because what is thought and repeated, will undeniably come to life.
Does that notion work for you? Can you see how what happens within you must also happen in your reality? I want you to really understand this idea because it bears repeating since everything that happens out there has been created within you first.
I’m not talking about your desires being handed to you on a silver platter since that would be unreasonable. I’m talking about what you hold in mind and repeat with conviction and emotion must show up in your life, assuming you do the work and are committed to the process.
Success can encompass many things, whether it be: health, wealth, relationships or the simplest things. You get to decide what constitutes success, so it’s best to find your own definition and abide by it. Don’t be swayed by other people’s opinions because that will give you the impression you are unsuccessful. Does that make you feel better knowing you needn’t compete against others? I sure hope so.
I’m drawn to the British psychologist and author Robert Holden who explains in Authentic Success how we must redefine success to encompass the journey to get there. It’s not enough to focus on the prize because many people who achieve success find they are more unfulfilled than before: “It is my experience that many people relate to success as something to celebrate at the end of their days, when they finally “get there.” All their energy is invested in a ticket that will get them to a land called “there.” But life isn’t just about “getting there”; it is also about “being here” and enjoying your journey.”
Are you comfortable with this idea? I know I’m emphasising the point, but I want you to get an impression of what it means to create success on your terms, not others. What we believe about ourselves is the foundation for how the world responds to us.
Thoughts are a powerful phenomenon and many of us are unconscious to them because we’re habituated to ignore them. Mainly because they pass through our stream of consciousness at a rate of 70,000–80,000 thoughts per day. It is no surprise we ignore them, there are just too many thoughts to know which ones are relevant.
To celebrate ourselves, we ought to make peace with parts of ourselves we are at war with. Peace means to reconcile negative or unconscious thoughts with the wholeness of who we really are. So if you consider yourself to be an anxious person, you disregard the possibility of being a peaceful person; you rule it out so to speak.
The Wholeness Of Who You Really Are
“Go where you are celebrated — not tolerated. If they can’t see the real value of you, it’s time for a new start.” — Unknown
I’m sure you’ve heard the story about the baby elephant tethered by a rope to a stake? It turns out that as the elephant matures to fall size, it remains chained to the stake unable to break free. Even though it is capable of escaping, it is held captive because of its conditioning from an early age. Whilst a fictional story, it correlates with our own story of how setbacks or failures limit our potential.
For example, I know a relative who is considered an anxious person and has trouble flying on planes. She believes her character is fixed and refuses to change. Yet, when asked if she’s tried meditation or other forms of relaxation therapy, she dismisses them because she’s convinced her personality is static.
Our behaviour is anything but determined. The science of epigenetics tells us that our brains are constantly evolving depending on the stimuli it receives. Do you know people like this? No matter what you say, they won’t change or to be more precise, refuse to change. It can be difficult to convince them otherwise.
Embracing ourselves foremost is central to awakening our greatest potential. To celebrate our own selves means to accept both our negative and positive characteristics. Wholeness is a story about welcoming every part of you while realising you are none of those things in isolation but in their entirety. When combined, they make up the wholeness of who you really are.
If we want the world to celebrate us, we must accept ourselves unconditionally in order to find clarity. You can become a greater version of yourself because if the thought is active within you, its potential to merge into the wholeness of your character will come to life.
Celebration of oneself is a journey that comes from within and radiates outward. It is an endless river as Jiddu Krishnamurti points out. So, what will you choose? Will you be a shining light others are drawn to or will you withhold your greatness because of the fear of being found out? I trust you choose in alignment with your core self.
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Originally published at medium.com