When you are reading this, it is very likely you are struggling with what to do next or if what you are doing is the right thing. If you don’t feel stuck at the moment, you have been there and wonder if there is a smoother way to handle those kinds of situations in future.
Let’s start with the question why we are feeling stuck in the first place? Shouldn’t we have all the answers by now?
Very often we find ourselves in a position where we don’t know the right answer in a topic where we felt so safe already. Most times, this feeling comes up in the middle of a process that we already started and then something happens, that makes us doubt our decision we either made or are about to make. In order to get back into the flow of life, you want to find out why you feel stuck, so that you can work on a solution. Even though the detailed reasons may vary a lot, there underlying reasons are just a few:
Self-doubt & Insecurities:Often we feel so good about a decision and then there happens one little thing and all of a sudden, we question it all. Sometimes after someone made a comment, other times because of a bare feeling we have or because something goes wrong, really wrong. Not knowing what to do next, feeling stuck means we are doubting ourselves. We are insecure about the options we have and if we are able to make the right decision. We fear making a wrong decision. We might be very self-confident actually but in this specific case we are not. Which can feel very irritating. So, what to do about this? Remind yourself of your strength! We are made to adapt to change and find creative solutions for whatever comes across our way. You have been struggling with something before, we all have. You overcame 100% of all obstacles in your life so far, you will overcome this one as well.
“If it’s not ok, it’s not the end.” – John Lennon
Calm yourself down. Breathe and do whatever makes you feel good. Something you know will release the tension. Move! If you’re feeling stuck, the worst thing to do is not to move but to pause. You want to get back to the flow, you want to move on, beyond this stagnation. If you can’t possibly think of a solution – which means your mind is simply strained – move your body. Body and mind are an entity. When you move your body, your mind will follow eventually. Take care of yourself, create positive emotions around you. Take a step back, don’t hold on the problem. At least for a little time. It is like a muscle. If it gets tired, it doesn’t make sense to keep it under tension, you need to release it and then you can move on. Now come back to yourself. You know who you are and what you are able to do. Believe in yourself! You will find a solution. Feeling insecure, is absolutely ok but don’t let it take over your whole life.
Overstimulation: Sometimes it is just too much. We have so much to do, so many tasks, that somewhere in the process our brain freezes. Those are the times where the last thing we want to do, is to take a step back and slow things down. There is so much to do, we can’t possibly stop and take a break. This is also the time, where we need to take a break more than ever. It is time to change perspective. This is when we get lost in the details. Get back to the meta level and look at things from a distance. That is all it sometimes takes. This might just be a cup of tea, a walk or a talk with someone you can talk about the topic at hand, in order to forget about all the important tasks but get back to the substantial matters. It is also just a little too much tension. You are just a little too close. Step away from it, breathe, look at it again and things will suddenly make sense. You are back in the flow of things!
Goodbye comfort zone:This is probably my favorite reason when I find myself stuck in the process. This is when we stepped out of our comfort zone and enter foreign terrain. In this stage, we can find ourselves in a mix of the two reasons above, somewhere between self-doubt and being overwhelmed, often with an extra serving of fears. This is the great time of personal development. This can happen during something you have done so many times already or while you’re doing something completely new. Let’s say you love your job, you’re in it since years and one day you find yourself stuck. It is simply a feeling. You don’t know what to do next, if you want to change something or simply leave things as they are. Things have been wonderful so far, why are you even questioning what you are doing – ever had this thought? Can drive one insane! I know. Because it seems to make no sense, when it actually makes so much sense! You hit a plateau and something within yourself is ready for change, for the next phase of your life. But you liked things as they were, so what you need in order to change something is this annoying feeling – feeling stuck. What to do about it? Ask the right questions. What changed? What is missing? Is there a desire you never payed attention to? Just don’t stop asking questions until you find the reason behind this feeling! It came into your life to let you know that it is time for change!
And for everyone who is in the midst of change and challenges, you are simply not done yet. You might think, you have changed so much and that you are exactly following your mission and passion but feeling stuck is a sign for you as well, to change perspective. There is something that you are missing or overlooking. No need to panic. Come back to your meta level and look at your life with the distance you need in order to see clearly. When we start something new, things are often a lot. We can lose ourselves in the details with all our enthusiasm. We have a hard time to decide what really needs our attention. Sometimes we need just a little more balance between acting and waiting and recovering. You will figure it out! You came here because you decided to try something new and this is great! Don’t let a time of stagnation drive you crazy, even if it is just at the beginning of your project. Be patient and get ready for the lesson this plateau has for you! There is one, believe me! Whether you see it right now or not!
Whenever we feel stuck until see no way out, this is shortly before discovering the lesson!
“The Darkest Hour Is Just Before Dawn”
We often need to feel trapped, until we have no other chance than doing something completely different. Which will then lead us on the right path, on a path we would have never thought of before. The darkest times are the pathway to the brightest paths in life. We just need to trust ourselves, that we can handle whatever life hands us. Because we can. We are made for it!