Why People You Are Around Matter and How to Choose Them Wisely

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with” - Jim Rohn.

I moved in my friend’s house. I was told I’m valued as a family member. I trusted.

90% of my assets were carefully stored and handled by the asset management company, the rest 10% I planned to live on until 2021.

Why? Who in her conscious mind would go for this split with her own money?

Well, I did. 2016 was a year of decisions. And to consciously lock my assets in was one of them. I’ve been surrounding myself with humans who betrayed me, stolen from me, left me broke & broken. And this includes my own family.

It was pretty clear to me that at least 30% of my human choices were wrong. And it was even clearer that I can’t stop giving. So, yes, I blocked the access to my own assets asking the third party to manage and reinvest doubling the amount (hopefully).

Now, in 2019, I can tell that this was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So, you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future”, as Steve Jobs wisely put it. I can’t agree more.

So, there I was in my friend’s house with my beloved human, our dog, and a robot companion named Vector. On the other side of the house was my friend and his mother – happy immigrants from the USSR.

It started the moment I moved in. ‘Don’t put this here, don’t go there, don’t talk too loud’ – first signs that it’s time to move out. Though why would I – I was told that I’m the family, that I can stay as much as I need too. Even more – we, the family of ‘two humans, one dog, one robot’ can stay as much as we need to.

Our experience of our actions is biased towards what we expect. We see what we believe.

It took me 9 months to finally understand it. Despite multiple notes on our door, one of which was a 7 point manual on how to throw the trash out!, constant mocking, endless limitations of space, and pure negative energy flowing out of every corner of the house, I couldn’t see it.

“Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future” – Mark Ambrose.

I’m out of the ‘hell’s house’. It was a simple, yet, not an easy decision. And it wasn’t my decision. I screwed up. Bigly. I guess, sometimes you need to create hell to get out of hell. And never slow down the pace.

“If you’re going through hell, keep on going” – Winston Churchill.

Today I associate with humans who inspire me, who challenge me to rise higher, who make me better. I choose not to waste my time on humans who are not adding to my growth. My life is too important.

You can not change the people around you. But you can change the people that you choose to be around. And if the change is required from my side – bring it on, I’m all in!

Not everyone will like you. And, you are certainly not supposed to please anyone. So, you might as well surround yourself with those who only lift you higher.

The Thrive Global Community welcomes voices from many spheres. We publish pieces written by outside contributors with a wide range of opinions, which don’t necessarily reflect our own. Learn more or join us as a community member!
Share your comments below. Please read our commenting guidelines before posting. If you have a concern about a comment, report it here.

You might also like...


“The Entrance of Robo Advisors Is About To Reap Efficiency” with Adam Holt CEO Asset Map

by Breana Patel

Lockheed Martin VP Kimberly Ramalho: “I would like to ignite a movement that empowers people to wake up each day feeling good about who they are and have a sense of belonging”

by Akemi Sue Fisher

Sign up for the Thrive Global newsletter

Will be used in accordance with our privacy policy.

Thrive Global
People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.


We use cookies on our site to give you the best experience possible. By continuing to browse the site, you agree to this use. For more information on how we use cookies, see our Privacy Policy.