One of the most frequent challenges in which people ask me for advice has to do with them wanting to know why people treat them the way they do. Usually they are referring to some form of negative interaction, or people not doing what they say they are going to do.
My usual response is simple and to the point: “We teach people how to treat us.”
This is not true in every situation, but it certainly applies to most.
If we don’t want someone to treat us in a certain way, then we have to take responsibility to ensure they understand that their behavior is unacceptable and will not be tolerated. We also have to be aware of how we treat them. Perhaps they are just mimicking our behavior.
Doing nothing is oftentimes seen as a signal that it is okay. So if you don’t like the way someone treats you or talks to you, or doesn’t do what they say they will; you need to speak up and let them know how you feel. You must let them know that it will not be tolerated in the future.
I also suggest that we take a close look at how we talk to ourselves and to others. Sometimes we are unaware of the signals we are sending out to others… and ourselves.
Here is a brief story I heard a long time ago about this subject:
A son and his father were walking in the mountains.Suddenly, his son falls, hurts himself and screams, “AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!”
To his surprise, he hears the voice repeating, somewhere in the mountain,“AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!”
Curious, he yells, “Who are you?”
He receives the answer, “Who are you?”
Angered at the response, he screams, “Coward!”
He receives the answer: “Coward!”
He looks to his father and asks, “What’s going on?”The father smiles and says, “My son, pay attention.”And then he yells to the mountain, “I admire you!”
The voice answers, “I admire you!”
The man yells out, “You are a champion!”
The voice answers, “You are a champion!”
The boy is surprised, but does not understand.Then the father explains, “People call this Echo, but really this is Life.It gives you back everything you say or do.”
Our life is simply a reflection of our actions. If you want more love in the world, create more love in your heart.
If you want more competence in your team, improve your competence.
This relationship applies to everything, in all aspects of life. Life will give you back everything you have given to it.
Your life is not a coincidence, it is a reflection of you!
Remember… Every day is a gift, and the quality of your life is your gift to yourself.