Hating everyone and everything was a way of life for me for a long time. I felt DONE. And, I knew that I needed a change.
If you can relate, then you. Are. My. People.
Well, who am I kidding, it kind of still is… I mean, I am negative (or, as I like to say realistic!)
I am sarcastic, dry, and I am NOT going to crack a smile at your joke unless you are award-winningly funny. And, even then, good luck.
So, how did I go from really, really negative and pissed at the world to owning my shit and loving my life?
It was actually quite simple. I am gonna share with you the five steps that I took to loving my life again.
Step 1: I started listening to my gut.
I STOPPED doing the things that I didn’t want to do. You want me to come to your birthday party and I have a million and one things going on and three kids and I’m exhausted?
Well, then I can’t make it.
No apologizing. No rescheduling. Just, no.
You want me to volunteer at school, and technically I am free during that hour, but it’s my ONLY hour this month that I am actually free… then, again no.
No guilt. No shame. Just, no.
I am hereby giving you permission to stop saying yes to shit you don’t want to do.
Step 2: Having fun without being productive.
The next step to owning my shit and loving my life was figuring out what I liked to do.
It sounds simple, but it’s easy to lose sight of what you do for fun when you have kids.
Can we just be un-fucking-productive for five minutes?
So, what do you do for fun? What lights you up?
For me, it’s date nights, reading, writing, and practicing inversions.
So, start doing things for fun again – without being productive!
Step 3: Discover your BIG purpose.
We have smaller purposes and bigger purposes and these are what connect us to our identity.
Some of your small ones might be raising your kids. Helping a friend. Contributing to the success of the business that you work in.
But, then you have a bigger purpose.
I believe that somewhere in the infinite space and time, God said: “Who will go and stop the cycle of abuse and depression in this family?”
And I said, “I will go.” And, I went.
But I did it. I am a warrior. I went to battle, and I won.
And, I forever changed the trajectory of my families lives.
For generations, those in my family have dealt with addiction, alcoholism, depression, and abuse.
And, I stopped it.
Me. A woman. A petite, average, regular, normal, imperfect woman.
It will never touch my three daughters.
And not only that, I am now helping hundreds of other women overcome the very same thing.
So I stopped it in my own family. And, I stopped in others.
THAT is my BIG purpose.
Step 4: Meshing.
Now, I want you to mesh the having fun with the BIG purpose.
I get to work with moms, creating our rules, designing our lives, and leaving a legacy. And, I literally wake up in the morning excited and fired up to do this.
Because you CAN have both! I know the negative side of me wants to say: “You can’t have your cake and eat it too.”
But, if you don’t love what you do every day, it might be time to change that.
Step 5: Do you.
The final step: You do you regardless of the outcome.
F*ck people pleasing – f*ck feeling baaa-AAAD – f*ck indecision – f*ck fear.
Just do YOU.
Now that you have all of these other things in your life in place, you know you are a rockstar.
Just. Do. You.
Keepin’ it real.
I’ll admit, I am still not one of those people who is super happy, sweet, smiley, and optimistic all the time.
But, I am a lot less negative. I don’t hate everything anymore. And, I do absolutely love my life.