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Often It’s Just The Simple Things in Love

Photo courtesy toimetaja-tolke Unsplash We women spend a lot of time on make-up, hair, nails, clothes, our bodies, looking good and smelling good; you get the picture. We’re doing this because this is what we do. Many of us believe we’re doing this for our self esteem. While that may be true, deeper subconscious beliefs […]

Photo courtesy toimetaja-tolke Unsplash

We women spend a lot of time on make-up, hair, nails, clothes, our bodies, looking good and smelling good; you get the picture. We’re doing this because this is what we do. Many of us believe we’re doing this for our self esteem. While that may be true, deeper subconscious beliefs have shown that women wear makeup not only to hide their imagined or not so imagined imperfections, but historically (think back to cave woman and antiquity) our survival depended on having a man provide for and protect us. Deep inherited subconscious programming reveals we must look the best from all the women, so that a man will choose us over other women (guaranteeing our survival). Aside from covering imperfections, we’re still wearing makeup to attract and keep our partners, while wanting to better than the other women around us.

I’ve worked as an Intuitive Advisor for a number of years. I’ve learned from the men I’ve spoken to, that while they’re very visual and find it pleasing to look at a beautiful, well put together woman, it’s not that new hairstyle, perfume, or lingerie that has him remembering you, long after the scent of your perfume has gone. It’s moments like the one below that has your man love you. If you don’t believe me, ask your man , “What is it that you love most about me?” and then be ready to receive and not judge his answer.

About six months ago, I was privy to sit in on a panel of men (ages 35–60) who were interviewed by a group of women. One woman asked each of the four men the same question, “ What was it that you loved most about your woman?” Each man shared a little something and the common thread was that it was in their woman’s way of being. It was her attentiveness to him, her warmth and appreciation for the little things he did. I was most affected by the story a young man whose girlfriend used to wait at the door each day for him to come home from work.

Every day she would be there to greet him and he would sit in his car for a few brief moments and watch her quiet beauty as she smiled and waved hello to him from the doorway. He would then get out of the car, go to the door and kiss her hello. He never once told her how much that small gesture meant to him; however, he shared that as one of the most endearing moments in his life. About a month before she left him, he noticed that she no longer came to the front door when he arrived home. He didn’t make the connection until she packed her things and moved out. He started to cry. He said that although it has been many years since this gal was in his life, this was the thing he loved most about her and she had been the love of his life.

Perhaps the story touched me so, because, I remembered, that when I was married and came home from the supermarket, one of my three sons, or my former husband, if he were home, would come to the garage door to greet me and see if I needed help carrying the groceries. I have never asked anyone to come to the garage, nor to help, they’d always done it of their own accord. I have learned to admire that quality in my sons, two of whom are married and doing this for their wives.

Imagine being that woman who gets to meet and be with a man that would appreciate her just being there for him ( I’m not talking 1950’s style). I’m talking about being present, not on an iphone or ipad, but just taking that short, quick moment of being present with one another. I think it is a lovely and simple gesture of love. I think people often overlook the short moments of being present in life that make love so meaningful and special. There is always a moment that brings love close and makes love grow. Love can be found in a simple touch, a smile, a stroke on the shoulder, or even knowing when to speak or when not to speak. Love is Intuitive.

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