Community//

What Do Men Love and Hate in a Relationship?

When talking about relationships, it’s easy to think of them only in terms of what you want. While we all have a list of traits we look for in an ideal boyfriend, it is important to think about what men want as well. Here’s a list of things men find great and not so great […]

The Thrive Global Community welcomes voices from many spheres. We publish pieces written by outside contributors with a wide range of opinions, which don’t necessarily reflect our own. Community stories are not commissioned by our editorial team, and though they are reviewed for adherence to our guidelines, they are submitted in their final form to our open platform. Learn more or join us as a community member!

When talking about relationships, it’s easy to think of them only in terms of what you want. While we all have a list of traits we look for in an ideal boyfriend, it is important to think about what men want as well. Here’s a list of things men find great and not so great when in a relationship.

Love: When a girl is confident in herself

Let’s be clear, no one likes being with someone who is insecure about themself. Think of it this way: If you think you’re worthy of someone else’s time and energy, then others will too. It’s not about what you wear or how you look – it’s about how you treat yourself, your attitude.

When you love yourself and feel comfortable in your skin, it really shows in the way you interact. Confident girls radiate positive energy and that’s what makes them so incredibly irresistible to guys, and no amount of money can buy that.

Hate: When she’s overly attached

When you’re in love, you want to spend every minute of your day with your partner. However, there’s a fine line between healthy and clingy behavior, and if there’s one thing guys really hate it’s feeling like they’re being controlled.

No one likes an overly attached girlfriend who acts like their mom and tells them what to do. Guys need their own space, maybe even more than girls do! So instead of checking up on him constantly, let him do his own thing. Respect his time and privacy.

Love: When they feel appreciated and needed

Whether it’s putting the food on the table or paying for the house and bills, it feels great to know that everything you’re trying so hard for is appreciated.

However, sometimes things just need to be said out loud. Whether it’s a compliment combined with an act of kindness or a simple ‘thank you’ from time to time, guys need to hear these words to feel appreciated.

Their practical nature also dictates that they need to help others out, so don’t hesitate to ask him for help whether you need to open a jar of pickles or change a light bulb.

Hate: When she won’t say why she’s mad

Every couple gets into an argument occasionally, but there’s no reason to be passive-aggressive about it. No one likes receiving a silent treatment, and guys get especially annoyed when girls won’t say why they’re mad. They really don’t like to play these guessing games, and they’d much rather you be direct.

Instead of shrugging and being ambiguous about the things that are bothering you, be honest. He can’t read your mind, but if you say what’s wrong, you can work together on solving the problem like adults.

Love: When she takes charge and initiates things

It is easy to expect guys to do all the hard work – text first, walk up to girls, call back after the date, etc. Because they’re the ones who usually initiate things, it can be really refreshing for them to see a girl taking charge. It takes some of the pressure off and quite frankly, it’s very attractive – not just in a relationship in general but in bed as well.

Whether it’s bringing exciting sex toys into the bedroom or being bossy and ordering him around, her being in control is a major turn-on and a huge confidence boost.

Hate: When she’s too focused on her looks

Guys like it when a girl dolls up occasionally, but spending hours in front of a mirror makes no sense to them, especially if that means she’ll be late for their date. In fact, most guys prefer a more natural look on a daily basis, and being able to see you just sit back and relax with a messy bun and sweats is quite attractive to them.

It shows you feel comfortable with yourself the way you are and don’t need a ton of makeup and perfect hair to feel beautiful.

Love: When they receive compliments

It may not seem like it, but guys actually love receiving compliments, maybe even more than girls do. They like them because those compliments show why their girl is with them and why she chooses to stay with them.

Nevertheless, they tend to play it off and make it seem like it’s no big deal and that they don’t need anyone praising them when in fact they thrive on getting compliments. Whether it’s about their humor, personality, or looks, tossing a couple of compliments their way is sure to earn you some brownie points.

Hate: When she gossips and/or talks too much

Good communication is an essential part of a healthy relationship. It helps you two bond and feel closer to each other. However, there’s communicating with your significant other and then there’s talking non-stop about things that don’t matter to them.

Men generally tend to talk less than women, and idle gossip isn’t their cup of tea. It may be harmless fun for girls, but to guys, it’s simply boring. Unless it’s a topic you both can discuss, it’s better to leave it for when you meet up with your girlfriends.

Love: When she has her own life to lead

Guys don’t want to be the only thing in their girlfriends’ life that they care about. In fact, it’s much more attractive to them when a girl has her own life going on, her personal interests, exciting career, and great relationships with friends and family.

They want a strong, independent woman who does things that make her happy because then they’re happy too. Continuing to do what you love and what matters to you while being in a fulfilling relationship is really the best of both worlds.

Hate: When she compares him to her ex

This one is a huge no-no. Whether you’ve been in a relationship for a while or have just entered one, bringing up your ex is never a good idea, especially if you use them to make comparisons with your current partner. It can mean that you’re still hung up on them, and that’s a huge hit to his ego. Let the past be past and move on so you can enjoy your current relationship as you should.

Wrapping up

To keep a relationship happy and healthy, it’s important to take a look from a male perspective instead of just looking at things from a female POV. Having these things in mind will make you a great girlfriend material and only make your partner appreciate you even more.

Share your comments below. Please read our commenting guidelines before posting. If you have a concern about a comment, report it here.

You might also like...

Relationship Goals 2019
Community//

Top 11 Relationship Goals for 2019

by Adamaris Mendoza
Community//

3 Questions To Ask Yourself That Will Help You Resolve Your Men/Relationship Problems Once And FOR ALL!

by Steffie Martin
Community//

“When you truly love yourself, you have the confidence to ask for what you want” with Fotis Georgiadis & Aimee Beltran

by Fotis Georgiadis

Sign up for the Thrive Global newsletter

Will be used in accordance with our privacy policy.

Thrive Global
People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.

- MARCUS AURELIUS

We use cookies on our site to give you the best experience possible. By continuing to browse the site, you agree to this use. For more information on how we use cookies, see our Privacy Policy.