What are you searching for?

We do quizzes, we visit fortune-tellers and psychics, we dream of faraway lands and adventures. Often in the hope that a magical solution will suddenly appear.

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I’ve always been a dreamer

Throughout my life, there’ve been many times I’ve been more comfortable in my own dream life than in the actual reality of life. 

Times I wish I could erase, or things I wish I’d done differently.

They say ‘everything happens for a reason’. Everything is a learning opportunity, a redirection, a pathway to a new phase in your life, or maybe just to show us the strength we have inside. And more often than not this is true.

But sometimes things are just really crappy, and it’s OK to want an escape – to be searching for something more.

As a dreamer I’ve had various scenarios running through my mind over the years:

· I was a princess or a famous movie star 

· I was exquisitely beautiful and smart and everyone wanted to be just like me

· I was so rich I could jet around the globe to exotic locales – eating all the food, drinking all the drinks –  but still be able to rock a red bikini like no one’s business (in actual fact I have never once worn a red bikini – or any bikini after the age of about 10, but in the land of the dream the sky’s the limit)

· I was living on a paradise island by the beach – blissfully happy with the love of my life, relaxed on a cabana lounge in a floaty boho beach dress – pina colada in hand, suntanned skin, the sun shining brightly through the palms, calm beach lagoon waters lapping gently across the soft white sand – my only thoughts were calmness and serenity

· I was a flight attendant or pilot jetting off all over the globe – soooo sophisticated and worldly-wise 

· I was a famous and admired singer – (I can actually barely sing a note to save myself but in my dreams, I was a rock star)

· I was a respected author of multiple bestselling books – insanely rich and sought after for my sage advice and outlandish tales

In high school my work experience was at a travel agency – I loved travel brochures; I could look at them all day every day. I didn’t care so much for dealing with customers – rather spending time dreaming about all the possibilities held within those glossy pages. 

Many of us love those Facebook quizzes that offer insightful advice into how we should be living our lives or who we are as a person. Valuable information like:

· Which Disney Princess are you?

· Who is your celebrity double?

· Who were you in a past life?

· Which of your Facebook friends is your soulmate?

· Which 80s rocker would be your perfect match?

I’ve taken my fair share of these and I’m happy to report that I’m definitely Belle from Beauty and the Beast, that Janet Jackson is my celebrity double and my perfect 80s rocker match is Rick Springfield.

Although I’ve gotten lots of laughs – I can’t say for sure that any of them have held the power to change my life. 

We do quizzes, we visit fortune-tellers and psychics, we dream of faraway lands and adventures. Often in the hope that a magical solution will suddenly appear. 

And there’s nothing wrong with that, or with anything that brings some mystery and fun into life. 

But I also know that if I want to change something in my own life, I have to lead it.

I have to be courageous and take action. All the Disney princesses in the world can’t do that for me.

If 2020 has taught us anything it’s that we should live our lives before it’s too late. 

Whatever we’re searching for, whatever it is that we want to change – we need to find it, have courage, and take action.

I get that sometimes it feels too hard. Sometimes we’re so exhausted and depleted from living a life that doesn’t feel right, that it takes all we have just to get through each day and remain sane. 

And that’s OK. But not indefinitely. 

Think about the things that light you up, the things that make you smile, the things that make you feel light and carefree – like anything is possible.

Do more of them.

If you’re a dreamer like me you’ll find yourself drifting off to other lands all the time. That makes us part of who we are and opens us up to new possibilities.

If your dreams are about things you can work towards, as goals then that’s great – dream big

If they’re pure escapism once in a while, go for it – we all need a bit of that now and then.

But if they’re escaping from the reality of your life because you’re continually unhappy then maybe it’s time to ask yourself why.

What is it you’re searching for? 

What’s missing?

Ask yourself – “Am I really happy?” 

If the answer’s no then work out why. 

Work out what it is that makes you happy. 

Work out what it is that makes you feel carefree, giggly – feeling lighter?

What brings a smile to your face?

Whatever that is – do more of that.

You get one life.

You deserve to be happy, no matter which Disney princess you are. 

Love, Nicky xx

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