What Are You Clinging To That’s Dragging You Down?

How do you free yourself from clinging, how can you stop this fear that undermines the pleasure of life?

Image courtesy of Unsplash

One thing that prevents people from living freely and enjoying life is clinging.

In everyday life, people are imperceptibly attached to things, people, situations, and places that they think bring happiness and security. Many of the things people have now have been obtained through a lot of work – a job, a house, a car, a partnership, and an image of something, carrying much “significance” for an individual. People unknowingly develop the awareness that they own them and begin to build their identity towards them.

Ownership, however, is a burden that makes people constantly feel afraid of losing “something.” Even the smallest change in circumstances makes them stand up, feel in danger and that at any moment “something” might be taken away from them.

This fear leads to an even stronger clinging to things; people start looking for ways to insure against the imaginary attackers who want to rob them. Ironically, the more an individual becomes afraid, the greater the likelihood of losing something. Almost in all cases, when people are desperately clinging to something, it happens that they lose it.

Deep attachment creates energy that seems to repel people from the object of their addiction.

People do not realize that by invading things, they chain themselves. They dream of freedom, but they put themselves in chains.

Even if they do not lose what one is attached to, the fear of losing it deprives the individual of the pleasure of enjoying it, depriving him or her of freedom.

In some cases, the individual is clinging to the idea that a particular job, house, person and so on must be theirs and they can only bring them joy, and when that does not happen, they have the feeling that they have plundered that someone constantly takes things away from them. This person constantly thinks that a thief is stalking him or her.

Many people are clinging to the memories and what they think was “determined” by their past. They cannot let past experiences go, and this prevents them from appreciating today. Until they remove the thoughts of the past, they remain constantly closed.

Much has been written about how people can be truly happy and free, and enjoy the things they currently have, only if this individual removes the past.

This, of course, does not mean giving up on all belongings and what one has; it means that an individual needs not to cling to them.

You think you are not addicted to anything?

In fact, you are clinging to everything – you cannot live without it, you have to have something at all cost, etc.

How do you free yourself from clinging, how can you stop this fear that undermines the pleasure of life?

1. First of all, to be free, it is necessary to let go, to stop clinging. The more you squeeze, the more your stuff slips away through your fingers. When you are relaxed and “open our hands,” they are “filled.”

2. Give up the possession of things. The cost of ownership is sticking to something. Know that nothing is everlasting, and nothing is just your possession. You cannot be afraid of losing something that you do not own.

3. Live at the moment and experience every moment. Rejoice in everything in your life, but be prepared to go on without it. Life is flowing, everything around you is changing – one comes, another one goes. Sometimes it’s necessary for the old to go away, so the new can come.

4. Whatever you have achieved, whatever you think you own, remember that you are not your job, you are not your house, you are not your belongings. Stop being determined by them. Whether you lose them or not, your essence remains unchanged.

5. Seeking happiness and security in the things around you is an illusion. When you act for them, you behave to the illusion. If you think that something outside you can make you happy, you give up your power and transfer responsibility to them. This puts you in a very precarious situation.

6. True happiness and real security are beyond the possession of things; it is within yourself. When you realize the power is within, you will not need adherence to the external.

7. Remember that no one can take away what is rightfully yours. If you lost something, then it was not for you. Trust your world to provide you with what you need. When you know that your attitude gives you peace of mind and happiness, when you are convinced that whatever happens, you will keep moving forward, no one can disturb your peace of mind.

8. Learn to give and to share small things, which you “cannot live without.” At first, it may seem horrible, but you will see that you can continue without them. In nature everything is on the move, nothing is stagnant, and when you remove the cling, you will have everything.

Enjoyed reading? Please share. We are in this world to help one another. All of us grow faster when we Master The Blank Page and support each other.

About The Author

Dr. Mila is an internationally known Business and Life Strategist, Decoder of Human Potential, and Change Catalyst. Her mission is simple: 1 million people around the world to Master The Blank Page™ and intentionally live a life of significance. I million people to create the greatest stories ever told, see the future in front of them, fill the pages ahead with matters of their heart, acts of kindness, and incredible stories of inspiration, and hope.

Connect with Dr. Mila:, Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn, Thrive Global, and Medium.

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