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What Are You Allowing?

Don’t blame others. Shift how you feel about yourself.

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Photo by Fares Hamouche on Unsplash
Photo by Fares Hamouche on Unsplash

One time I was asked to counsel and provide support for a group of business partners. They were struggling to align in the vision for their business and in their trust of one another.

Within seconds of my introduction, one of the partners immediately began to challenge my credibility and questioned why he should listen to me.

Without hesitating, I challenged his level of respect, his lack of tact, and how he showed up in an undignified manner. I challenged him and asked how this was showing up in his relationships and his business results. 

I made sure he knew I wasn’t going to be pushed around and shrink.

I told him that his business had problems that he didn’t know how to fix and that I did. I said that he could either increase his respect level and I would stay, or he could continue his lack of respect and I would leave them with their problem that they couldn’t solve, but that I was confident I could.

I gave him the choice, and he invited me to continue.

After a few hours of teaching, coaching, and adding value, that same partner invited me back to continue working with them. He recognized my value and we became close allies. If I would have allowed him to shrink me, he wouldn’t have appreciated my talents and skills.

He challenged me because he was testing my boundaries. At that moment he became a bully. Bullies don’t like to be bullied, so when I pushed back, he relented. We made magic after that and they’re still getting value on the work we did together.

The world treats you the way you allow it to, and according to the way you perceive yourself.

Don’t blame others. Shift how you feel about yourself.

Show up, and stand up for yourself. The respect level others have for you will instantly increase. It’s not disrespectful to honor yourself and your value, it’s the most loving thing you do for yourself and others.

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