We’re living in an age where everyone fantasizes about having the best relationship in the world, but no one is ready to accept the truth. The world today is full of activities that draw people closer to each other. Millions of dating Apps and websites are been launched every year. We talk about love and relationships in our various homes, workplaces, seminars, Churches and Mosques. People fall in and out of love every day. With the high rate of divorce in the world, I wonder where most relationships and families would be, 5 years to come?
The divorce statistics of England and Wales were about 101,669, as of 2017. In 2018, it dropped to 10. 6%, and 7.5 per 1,000 married men and women from 8.4 as of 2019. Then according to the UN, the country with the highest divorce rate in the world is the Maldives with 10.97 divorces per 1,000 inhabitants per year. The dream of every couple, and the singles, is to have a successful relationship. But why has divorce become the order of the day?
One of the major causes of divorce is the desire to find or get married to a “perfect partner”. This results in unnecessary behaviour like infidelity, lack of commitment and other minor relationship problems. Everyone wants a perfect lifetime partner. We all want to date and get married to the best man or woman in the world. Ask a newborn baby, whom their dream man or woman is, and they will tell you all the qualities they need from a potential partner. The bitter truth is that there is no perfect man or woman in the world. True love looks beyond physical appearance. It all depends on your own definitions of love. We can’t expect our partner to be flawless, whereas we are not. We are all born with some negative attitudes we most times, find it difficult to control. Even if we are to meet our soul mate today, our desire to live with a spotless life partner will still stop us from enjoying the relationship.
What we should be doing instead, is to focus on helping our partner, transition into the man or woman of our dream. Life partners are made, they are not born. Finding love and making it work requires that we learn to forgive, tolerate and be patient with our partner, instead of running from one relationship to another, searching for the right person. Love is characterized by forgiveness, patience and tolerance. We all want a long-lasting relationship, but without tolerance, as a core value in our lives, our relationships are bound to fail over and over again.
Let’s stop hoping that one day, we shall meet the right person-a flawless partner. Since we are not one (perfect), let us focus more on helping our partner to become the man or woman of our dream. Once we understand this, the high level of breakups will diminish.