I grew up with a lot of feelings of lack. As the result, I used to hold on to things. I was stingy. I didn’t want to share. I considered very carefully before I decided to expose my inner self. Things had to be on my terms. I wanted the scales to tip in my favor. Life was not fun.

Before you think of me as a total jerk, I changed my ways….

I changed my ways because I learned over time I was wrong. When you think you are going to have more of something by hanging on to it, you end up in the end with even less. This is true for money, friendships, material objects, love…

Little by little I dipped my toe into the sea of generosity, and it felt good. My life became richer.

Spiritual laws work the opposite of how our human thinking would believe.

If you want more of anything in your life, you have to give more of it. I know this sounds counter intuitive, but spiritual laws work the opposite of how our human thinking would believe. By giving more, we are freeing up the flow to receive. Holding onto things stagnates that flow.

Give more time, more love, more of your attention. Be generous with your money, your expertise, your compassion. Give someone else the credit.

Like attracts like, and by being more generous ourselves, we attract more generosity, and more abundance into our own lives. (here is an article about using these principles to foster global change, check it out later)

Give more time, more love, more of your attention. Be generous with your money, your expertise, your compassion. Give someone else the credit.

Give without expecting anything in return.

When we give with the expectation of getting something for it in return, people smell a rat ?. The whole equation backfires. If you haven’t been used to being generous, at first it feels very threatening. You can feel as if you might lose out on something.

“No one has ever become poor by giving” Anne Frank

It is remarkable how even in adversity, some people always find a way to give. The Franks, even when in hiding, didn’t hesitate to share what little they had.

We can all give more.

It isn’t a symbol of privilege to give. Rich and poor all have opportunities to give. We can give in ways that involve money, but most of our giving can be done by anyone, regardless of finances.Lending a hand, smiling at people, letting someone go ahead of you in a line, going out of your way to check on someone, and donating things you no longer use are all forms of giving.

If it feels scary to give more, you are human. It’s the ego that is resisting, but you can give anyway. Stretch yourself. Trust. When you give, you will receive even more.

Remember, we aren’t giving to get something in return, that will always backfire. We trust that the natural flow of the universe is to match like with like.

What we receive can show up in forms we might not recognize.

Job opportunities, friendships, offers of support, invitations all have value.

Speaking of Value, on your job, in your relationships, for your clients, aim to give more value than people expect. You aren’t a doormat, you are consciously creating great experiences for people.

In the end, Strengthen the cycle by contemplating how grateful you are for all the gifts in your life. Be grateful for the material and the non-material treasures that you have.

When you first venture down the road of being more giving, the universe may test you, and you may be tempted to go back to holding on to things, but just keep increasing your giving. You won’t regret it.

Get my new book Happy Ever After. It’s a book on growing genuine and lifelong happiness, the type of happiness that can’t be taken away from you no matter what sort of craziness is happening in the world. We can all use that right now.

I made a free 5-day Mastering Happiness email course, and I want to share it with you! Visit me at christinebradstreet.com where you can get your course for free.

originally published at Medium.