Average success rate of couples counseling is around 75%, as per the American Psychological Association. Currently, Emotional-Focused Therapy or EFT is practiced. In EFT approach, the limited patterns of communication between distressed couples is changed, so that their emotional response is improved. More secure attachment gets established. The time needed to attain this goal differs on the range of marital damage. For this, you need to choose a good marriage counselor.
The marriage counselor’s advice helps to improve a couple’s relationship. They play a vital role in healing the differences between couples and finally fixing their relationship. If you make a mistake in selecting a marriage counselor than marital issues can deteriorate and cause increase in conflicts.
Avoid picking the first therapist but compare different marriage counselors, so to get a suitable one. Below are some tips to find the right marriage counselor to fix your relationship.
What are their specialties?
Marriage counselling are of different types including couples counseling, family therapy, religious-based counseling, Imago therapy, marriage-friendly therapy, Gottman Method, Narrative Method, and more. Only few specialists get qualified and gain experience, so do a basic research. Besides expertise area consider their gender.
Make sure that both of you are comfortable with the counselor chosen or else one will be less committed than another. The marriage counselor desires to start therapy in a positive manner.
Best marriage counselors believe that relationships are always reparable with sufficient goodwill and effort. The couples also need to have a robust stance that their reconciliation is attainable through counseling. Give your therapist an assurance that both of you desire to arouse the romance.
There are few couples, who go for counseling with an aim to end their relationship instead of taking help from the counselor to heal it. Best marriage counselor is always optimistic about making changes to regain a closed relationship.
Easy to communicate
You and your partner need to be comfortable in communicating clearly and freely with the therapist. Express yourself without any fear of being condemned. The therapist and the couples need to have a candid relationship.
If a single person is at ease in discussing sensitive matters then this whole process can backfire. Discussing hard matters helps to resolve the root issues. Marriage counselor must be capable to make the couple feel open and prepared to talk.
The first thing to ensure is that the couples and the marriage counselor are in synch with what to expect from this therapy. During the first session this needs to be discussed, so as to establish a foundation of what to plan further.
If the point of view differs then counseling can flop. If everyone is aware about the end game then a roadmap can be created, which will help in revamping your relationship.
If you can afford than cost is not an issue but if you have limitations then find a therapist that suits your budget. You can even get options to pay as per your income. Some counselors willing accept whatever a couple can afford. There are a few, who charge for missed session. Remember, marriage counseling is not covered under health insurance.
A marriage therapist capable to lead as well take a backseat whenever necessary is crucial. Personality clashes can be bad, so look for one that matches the nature of you and your spouse. The therapist has to be compatible with both, which can be evaluated in the first session. If there is no connection then look for another counselor.
Time & occurrence
Choose a time that does not conflict with professional and personal life of your spouse or you. Session length also needs to be considered. Lengthy conversation can break unnecessary areas, which are better to be left buried. Meeting must be sufficient enough and even how many sessions are needed must be worked in advance.