Photo by Nine Köpfer on Unsplash

As a society, we should do a better job of encouraging ourselves and others to do well. I did not always think this way. Like many type ‘A’ personalities, I felt that I always had to do better than other people to succeed. As a woman in business it seems you must continually prove yourself, your worth, and your value. “You are only as good as your last win” –and– “What have you done for me lately,” were consistent messages when I worked in the corporate environment. How could you possibly consistently prove yourself if you were not better than everyone else?


Women tend to struggle with this quite often.  The good news is that this mindset can easily be changed by increasing your self-awareness, honing your self-leadership skills, and accepting the fact that there is enough abundance in the world to go around.

Abundance literally means “a very large quantity of something.” When we believe there is so much of something in the world, we tend not to look at things through a competition focused lens. For example, I recently wrote a personal growth book.  Following my research on the different types of self-help books out there, I found that there were quite a few of them. Some with similar messages, others with a different spin, but so many for readers to choose from. If I lived with a scarcity mindset, I could have easily convinced myself that there was no point in writing the book because the market was already saturated. However, I chose to live with an abundance mindset, believing there are enough readers in the world and enough room in the market for my book too, and guess what, that mindset led to the successful publication of Your Extraordinary Self.

Living with a prosperity or abundance mindset means you are not consumed by what you do not have, you value your unique qualities, capitalize on your strengths and recognize you have what it takes to be successful, whatever that looks like for you. For some that means leading your family in a healthy lifestyle and living in abundance, for others it may be career related and for a few it could be about becoming an entrepreneur. Success, much like beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Living life with an abundance mindset means you truly believe there is enough to go around. Enough money, enough praise at work, enough love, enough friends. An abundance mindset leads us to want others to succeed in life just as much as we want ourselves to succeed.  We do not have to be successful at the expense of others, nor does the fact that others may have what you want mean there is none (or even less) left for you. An abundance mindset helps us strive to be better every day because each new day is an opportunity to learn, love, live and grow. I have never met a successful person, who lives their life with an attitude of scarcity.

There are many things we can do to shift our thinking from scarcity to abundance, almost all of which have to do with how we speak to ourselves and the words we choose to use.  Here’s a little something you can try.

Abundance Mindset – Quick Tip

Remove the words “If only” from your vocabulary.  When we preface a thought with the words “If only”, we are creating a scarcity mindset.  Our mind automatically begins to believe that we do not have enough of something to be successful in what it is we are hoping to achieve.  When that phrase (or similar ones) crop up, try replacing with something to the effect “I am excited to” or “I am grateful for” and finish the sentence accordingly.  For example instead of “If only my boss liked me more than she likes Dave, I would have competed for that promotion at work” try “I am excited to compete for this promotion and regardless of the turnout, it’s an opportunity to showcase my skills and open the door to future possibilities ”

Living with an abundance mindset opens the doors to possibilities we never knew existed and helps us to encourage and lift others along the way.  The more we celebrate and embrace awesomeness in others, the more of it we will find within ourselves.