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The Solution for Feeling Stuck, Isn’t Change

The Real Truth, From A Recovered Change-a-Holic!

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Photo from Unsplash
Photo from Unsplash

Let me start by saying, I know what stuck feels like.  I was stuck in an unhappy marriage.  Stuck in a hourly job.  Stuck with bills, responsibilities, and debts. 

I wanted to run from the feeling of living a life that felt trapped.  I felt lost.  I knew something needed to change.  I knew I was meant to feel and experience more than this.  I was right, but what I didn’t know was that just the change alone wouldn’t free me. 

I left the husband.  I found a way to make more money.  But nothing changed in how I felt inside.

Leaving didn’t free me from the control. 

The manipulation still dictated my emotions. 

The lack of self worth still held me back.

The depression still owned my mind. 

The emotional roller coaster still had me buckled in for a ride that someone else controlled. 

My couch still had me stuck on my back, drained of energy by most afternoons.

Until I Stood Up!

I didn’t know what to do from there, but I did listen to the part of me that told me to get off my back, off that couch, right now!  It was the same voice I heard the day I dropped the dish in the sink, and knew for the first time that I didn’t have to stay.   It is the part of me that seems to guide me when I forget that I am in charge.

The choice to find my freedom came internally.  Changing my outer situation wasn’t the solution. 

I was remarried when this happened.  I found new love, to someone who was supportive in all the ways I desired.  Someone who loved me as I was.  I found what I thought would solve my pain.  But it didn’t.  

Feeling stuck comes from inside.

Believing that your life isn’t yours. 

That your emotions are happening to you.

That situations are dictating your experience.

That you are not living your truth.

With so much emphasis lately on changing your life to find happiness.  I am here to say, for me, it wasn’t anything outside of me that freed me.

I found freedom inside. By taking my power back and becoming the owner of my life and emotions again.

It wasn’t overnight.  I still sometimes found myself looking for the answer in external situations and people.  But with consistency and a lot of digging into my soul, I found my freedom.  I had the key to the chains all along.  

Ask yourself this…

If nothing outside of me changed, how could I still find freedom where I am now?

In your 9-5, can you be fulfilled and confident in your worth?

In your marriage, you can grow personally?

In your emotions, you can feel them without giving them power over your actions?

In your NOW can you find PURPOSE?

As an advocate for people choosing to evolve! Each person’s evolution looks different.  Maybe the solution for you isn’t to start a business, maybe it is finding your purpose within your 9-5.  Maybe you aren’t able to jump into a new life, and that’s ok, because the jump isn’t going to be the solution alone. You just might land and find yourself feeling stuck again. 
The answer to freedom is inside you.  

Start there before you look to change, for change sake.

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