Sadness has its purpose and we so underestimate it.
We underestimate our emotions in general and the effect they have on our wellbeing and success in life. We only pay attention to them when dramatic storms come and we cant avoid them any longer. We think of them as nuisance. If we feel them, we think we will be less productive, they will slow us down, they will make us weak and vulnerable. Emotions are the feminine in us. The more we deny them, the more we deny our feminine energies which are needed for a healthy life. In a world that is mostly based on masculine values of success and achievement, it can be hard to create space for our feminine side. We must experience its value in order to embrace it.
Many entrepreneurs have had difficult childhood and are trying to make it up with lots of hard work and impact. And sometimes positive experiences can replace the negative or difficult ones, but our emotions around those experiences, our sadness, grief and shame has to be felt, released, understood and healed, otherwise they rear their “ugly” head in your life and in your business. The main reason for this is that emotions take physical place in your body and your mind because they are energy and the more emotions you keep inside, the less energetic space there is for other feelings to come in — that of creativity, happiness, joy, excitement etc. They are blocked because the sadness, anger and grief have parked themselves indefinitely within you. It time for you to put down their parking break and let them leave you, so that other inherent emotions and capabilities can become and grow within you.
Here is the main value of feeling your difficult emotions — sadness, grief, anger and shame give us depth as human beings and allows us to connect to others much more deeply then through any other feeling or activity. This is the true purpose of sadness, this is the true purpose of grief, anger and shame you have — it allows you to connect because it exposes your vulnerability. And so much research has come recently, with Brene Brown’s work of how important vulnerability is for a healthy, rewarding and rich life we all crave — even the entrepreneurs if they would be honest and admit it. All the hard work you put in, all the proving of yourself is for one reason only — so you can finally be accepted, loved and belong. And vulnerability allows you to do that, I wouldn’t say painlessly, but in a much quicker and efficient manner then achievement ever will. The reason for that is it doesn’t take a detour. Vulnerability goes straight to the heart and allows it to express and heal itself quicker then if you took the mind route. Why? Because the mind is afraid of the heart. No one ever told you this, but why do you think the mind builds such big castles and walls around itself with achievement, intelligence and a hard core drill, it’s because it wants your full focus, because it’s petrified of what will happen if you suddenly focus on your heart. It’s petrified because the castles and walls will dissolve in one big swoop, and your mind will suddenly feel lost and won’t be able to guide you any longer. And that is a good thing, because the mind is the child and the heart is the adult, and we had it the wrong way all along.
I just saw a cute Pixar film called Inside Out, where the family bonds deeply over sadness, which they weren’t able to do in any other way. By releasing pent up sadness, instead of pretending and trying desperately to find and express joy, they reach togetherness, which heals them and allows them a fresh start. On beautiful clean grounds of their souls.
All feelings exist for a reason and learning to access them is the meaning of a rich life. If you are interested to live a rich life and stop building mind castles in the air, if you are interested in building and growing your businesses from the heart instead of purely from the mind, for reasons of exploration and joy, instead of proving yourself and achievement, then do get in touch. As a Transformation Catalyst, I can guide you to make a dramatic shift and process your difficult emotions before emotional storms of your life hit the fan, or even while they are happening. I can hold the space for you and help you transform your sadness, anger or shame into your own personal power. Remember, the only thing you can lose is the pretend life you are working so hard to keep running, and what you stand to gain is what you craved all along — a life of meaning and connection.
Let’s build and grow your business from the heart. Click the link to connect https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=12522942
Originally published at medium.com