There is so much stuff that we’ve “got” to do (big sigh)!
“I have to take my son back to school“
“I’ve got to go to work”
“I need to take the car to the garage”
“I must go to the supermarket”
“I’m late. I have to get it finished”
“I’ve got to be on the 06.15 Monday morning”
“I need to go to the dentist”
“I must buy a new pen”
Our lives are full of “have to’s” and “got to’s” and “need to’s”.
Let’s face it we are busy people; things to do, places to go, people to see.
What we say and how we say has an impact on our attitude to what we are doing. If I have got to go to work, it can create a feeling of resentment – I have got to do it. I don’t have any choice. It’s not my preferred act. I am compelled to comply. They bring with them a reluctance and a lack of will, and create, at a subconscious level, a negativity and a submission to victimhood that will play out at a conscious level too.
So, let us change the inner dialogue. Let us challenge that negativity. Let us turn this submissive mindset to a positive, constructive and grateful mindset; after all, we do have a choice.
My good friend Huw shared this one with me, and it’s brilliant. It fundamentally exposes our slide into complacency, arrogance and victimhood, and challenges us to be where we should be, revelling in joy, opportunity, and choice.
Now, I’m a pretty positive chap, as those of you that know me would testify. A glass is not half-full or half-empty of water; it’s overflowing (with opportunity) and “May I have a bigger one please!”
Huw’s challenge to me was to replace all these verbs with the verb “get.”
“Got to” now becomes “get to.”
The same for “have to”, “need to” and “must do”.
“Get” in itself is not a pretty word, but it is a hugely positive one. The statements at the top are fundamentally and excitingly transformed to statements of opportunity, gratitude, pleasure and privilege;
“I get to take my son back to school“
- I have a son – what a joy!
- My son has a school to go to – we are lucky
“I’ve get to go to work”
- I have a job!! – that means I can earn, add value, fulfil my self-esteem etc etc etc
- I am part of a team
“I get to take the car to the garage”
- I am privileged enough to own a car and I can get it fixed
“I get go to the supermarket”
- I can buy food, and a great selection too.
- I can feed my family and myself
“I’m late. I get to get it finished”
- Whatever “it” is, it is something important that I am able to do. So I may have to work late, but, wow, the world needs me to do “it”!
“I’ve get to be on the 06.15 train Monday morning”
- I have a rail network that takes me to where I need to go
- And I can afford it
“I get to go to the dentist”
- I have teeth!!
- and a health service to look after me (them)
“I get to buy a new pen”
- I can write, I am educated, I have something to write down of importance to me, and others
- There are shops that have pens
- I can afford a pen
It is amazing how this simple swap changes our whole view on the world. Three little letters can transform our mindsets and make us smile.
It is beautiful.
Go on. Try it. Try “get”
When next you find yourself saying with a sigh “Ach, I’ve got to …” Change it. Smile and say “Hey, I get to ….. How lucky am I.”
Enter a world of joy and gratitude.
You will never look back – Thanks Huw.
Hurrah – Manley