The Person You’re Mad at Doesn’t Exist Anymore!

But, that’s okay, because you don’t exist anymore either.

Hear me out:

When you think about someone who hurt you in the past, it can be hard to let it go. You might still view them with a lot of judgment, anger, and resentment because of the way they treated you. And, a lot of times, you’ve carried this anger around for a long, long time…

Many of us continue to think about that person who hurt us (even if it was years ago) as if they’re still there, perfectly preserved. Unchanged. Ready and able to hurt you all over again. It’s like they’re somehow frozen in time (at least in your mind). 

Imagine someone who wronged you. It’s likely they popped up at a certain age and triggered a bodily reaction. Am I right?

You’ll continue to hold on to the perception of who they were when they treated you so badly until you remove the charge of the situation. Sometimes, you continue to replay old, past encounters in your head like a really bad movie even daily if the hurt was bad enough.

But, if you think about it, that you from ten years ago simply doesn’t exist anymore. You’ve grown up. You’ve changed. Evolved. And you’ve become a better person.

It’s fascinating to think that the person you’re angry and resentful toward doesn’t exist anymore either. They’ve grown and evolved, and hopefully, become a better person along the way.

If you’re holding on to that anger and resentment because you’re still carrying that old perception of them with you, it becomes a limiting belief. It has the power to consume you and it’s going to lower your vibration and possibilities for new futures.

For example, if you were broken up with in a sudden way, you may create a limiting belief that all men are going to treat you in the same mean, disrespectful way. Expecting all men to act a certain way can keep you closed off from new relationships. It can affect all your future relationships. You become afraid to trust. Moving on can feel almost impossible! 

We can often unconsciously go through life with these fixed ideas, judging all for the past transgressions of a few souls who hurt our fragile hearts.

So, how can you heal?

  1. The first and biggest step is realization… that aha moment when you recognize that your past is keeping you from your future.
  2. The next step is to practice compassion. For yourself primarily. Don’t beat yourself up! You know better now. It’s time to do better. It’s time to let go of beliefs that are holding you back.
  3. Perform a cord-cutting and an energy clearing. Think of it as a mental disconnect from past hurt. Bring the person you want to cut cords with in front of your mind’s eye. See any threads of energy that move from you to them and visualize yourself cutting these cords, and bringing the energy back to you. After going through the clearing and cord-cutting process, my clients come out more open-hearted, more receptive to new relationships, and filled with forgiveness and compassion.

I wish you love and detachment on this journey – you are worthy of using any excess space you’ve found during this trying time to move past these hurts and baggage. Lightness is your next step!