The Most Powerful Part of Forgiveness

“Nothing frustrates your enemy more than a smile”

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Photo by Gabriel Matula on Unsplash

Smile at your enemy. 

Sounds ridiculous? Well, it works. It might be one of the hardest skills you need to learn, but believe me, smiling at your enemy gives more satisfaction than spitting in his face. Show you’re above the situation and that you don’t have to prove anything. This way you avoid a lot of stress that accompanies each argument and you will feel much better about yourself. 

Then go one step further, just smile! Smile at your reflection in the mirror, at strangers on public transport, at your boss or your loved ones. Smiling stimulates the mind and the brain, and it also radiates positivity to its receiver.

How can you do it when you feel so much anger and all the fustration and the last thing you want to do on earth is forgive??

Take it easy. Stress, fear and anger are the main causes of inner conflict or conflict with others. Frustration will not solve your problems. Forgive yourself or others for an unwanted situation, and discover your peace of mind when you let things go. 

Then, there are times when all you have to do is shut up.

“You should not be afraid of silence”

Why have so much anger and aggression in our lives? Sometimes we don’t even feel like a fight but from one word to another it grows into a full-blown argument. Sometimes it makes sense to bite your tongue and let the issue go. Keeping your mouth closed and thinking twice before saying the first thing that comes to your mind can save you a lot of headache and unnecessary arguments.

We don’t necessarily realize how much our beliefs affect our lives. They don’t just exist in our heads, they form our habits. The logic seems quite simple: if we want to change our behavior, we need to rethink our habits and the thoughts we attach to them. One good way to do this is to practice mindfulness, so we actually let go of who we think we are. Negative emotions such as anger or resentment are nothing but distractions. They shouldn’t define us.

“It is an amazing but true thing that practically the only people who ever say mean, insulting, wounding things to us are those of our own households.”  – Dorothy Dix

This is so true – we are kind to strangers and polite with clerks in stores; but we express our everyday frustration interacting with those who are the closest to us. I know it too well from my own experience: losing my temper or simply acting like a jerk with my mom who calls me to ask what I want to have for our family dinner.

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People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.


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