Around a week ago, I lost a ‘friend’s mother’. My friend was and is still devastated. I can feel her soul shattering grief as I have been in the same boat a few years ago, when I lost my mother to cancer. No amount of fame, power, money or success can compensate for the loss of our loved ones and that too of a MOM?
Then why is it that when they are around we never make the time to be with them? Instead, we keep running around in circles doing endless meaningless chores and by the time we are ready to hit the bed, we feel happy that we managed to complete our ‘to do list’ for the day. The next day, the same routine starts and before you know it, the day has ended and we have added another day’s gap between our loved one, be it a mother, father, sibling or a friend, and us. There is always a time crunch. But, there are 24 hours, which is 1440 minutes, in a day and if ‘we make up our heart’ we can eke out at least .1 percent of our day for our loved one. Our schedules consume us to perform each and every task as though our lives hinge on it, but if we were to go to the supermarket at 3.30 instead of 3.15 would it really be a life changing decision. And instead, we could use that time to make a quick phone call or better still, drop by a loved one, it would be….. like an ice-cream sundae on a hot summer day.
Hang with your mom before it’s too late- Image courtesy-Flickr
So when the choices are clear and the facts are simple why we do still end up being caught up in the endless maze of everyday life?
It’s just that we don’t try hard enough and take our loved ones for granted. The trip to the supermarket or the mall or even getting gas filled, assumes gigantic importance in comparison to spending time with our mom and dad. Besides, the common rules of the world that we are growing up in dictates that we give more weightage to our careers and succeeding in our professional lives than succeeding in our personal lives. Our profession has become our badge of honor and as long as that badge shines brightly no one cares about whether we even have a badge for our personal life. The fear of professional failure besides being deeply entrenched in our psyche is also further reinforced by most people’s advice, who will always caution you against taking a break in your career, because of personal reasons, as you may get left behind. In fact, when I took time off from work to look after my mother, most of my friends cautioned me against this ‘rash’ decision as I would get left being in my career. Well, I made my choices, and have no regret because I was with my mother till the end.
I was a passenger right till my mother’s last ride to the crematorium. After she passed, I have continued on my journey of life, without any regrets.
So rather than regrets pick up the phone and call your loved ones to tell them that you love them and ditch the laundry list for an impromptu evening out with them. Go ahead, be a good passenger to them in life rather than wait till the end.
As for one unanswered question-Did I get left behind in the rat race? Sure I did…because I was never a rat but a lioness leading the way.
Till next time-Live life Empressize.