When it comes to bettering yourself in some way, your overall success can ultimately be attributed to a series of small initiatives. Breaking your plan down into gradual steps — rather than jumping in head first — can allow you to perceive the goal as more realistic or achievable.
Regardless of this notion, many people still often fail to follow through with what it is that they set their heart on. Contrary to popular belief, it isn’t always because they are lazy or unmotivated. Often times, it actually has to do with the fear — and not the kind you’re likely thinking of. We always talk about the fear of failure or just not being good enough, but we fail to recognize another aspect of fear that is very much prevalent in these types of instances.
It’s the fear of bringing others down on our journey to bring ourselves up.
Since many of us are naturally empathetic people, the thought of hurting others is inevitably disconcerting. However, sometimes it’s the price to pay when you are committed to achieving something worthwhile.
Here are three decisions that you should never feel guilty about making throughout the process:
1. Allowing yourself to outgrow people.
At some point, you have probably faced the harsh realization that you just have nothing in common with people who you were once inseparable with. However, while some friendships dissolve as a result of losing touch, others have a bigger reason that you are choosing to ignore. These people serve no real purpose in your life anymore, whether it’s an issue of maturity level or a toxic behavior that you hope to disassociate yourself from. As much as you may want to salvage a friendship that is clearly detrimental, resist the urge to. If you truly want to grow as a person, it’s important not to spend time with people who hold you back.
2. Knowing your worth — and being up front about it.
Confrontation isn’t easy — and that’s why sometimes it seems easier to avoid it. You don’t want to come off as rude or self-entitled, so you keep your lips sealed as an unfair situation escalates. In these situations, it is important to remember that recognizing your own capabilities doesn’t mean that you’re bragging or talking yourself up. It just indicates that you are confident in your own abilities, and you aren’t afraid to say so. Plus, if you approach it correctly, there is no need to feel guilty about offending others. In fact, most people will consider this an admirable trait.
3. Sticking with something simply because it’s comfortable.
We have all found ourselves in circumstances where we know deep down that we need to move on, but that warm, fuzzy comfort zone makes it difficult. Whether it’s a bad relationship or an unfortunate job situation, that nagging “dead end” feeling keeps coming back — but we continue to stubbornly push it to the side by convincing ourselves we’re happy. In a sense, we feel that we owe it to ourselves to remain in the situation just because it’s what we once wanted. We also feel that we owe it to the other people involved, and start putting their needs before our own. A new mindset is nothing to feel guilty about. Once you finally let yourself come to terms with it, you will open the door for an array of new experiences that you almost let go — and you will be grateful that you did.
Originally published at www.huffingtonpost.com